OvallyBalls can now reveal that our operatives have made secret recordings of discussions that took place some years ago. Names may have been changed to protect the not-that-innocent.
Wrigel Nay: Right, chaps, this salary cap is a bit awkward, eh what? If we are to DOMINATE the Premiership and the European Cup, we need you players. And obviously you won’t play as well if you’re not millionaires.
Basil ‘Bog’ Brush: Well, y’need the motivation. I coulda gone inta footba’, and got my money for nothing, and my chicks for free. In rugby, I have t’ make a lo’ o’ no-arms tackles, and tha’ stings a bi’ sometimes.
Maro Match (melodiously): Uhmm, I’ve got lots of arms; I’m like an octopus, mate. Uhmm, but every extra 100 grand grows another arm. Plus, it’s fodder for my political campaign chest.
The Puny Voles: We’ve got our private doctors and personal massage therapists to pay for. It’s not cheap being injured all the time. We are reduced to pretending to go on Z-list sleb programmes to survive. And it’s boring, so the finest Dom is in order.
Maro Match (melodiously): Uhmm, Classic Dom?
The Puny Voles: Nah, mate, Dom Pérignon.
Wrigel Nay: Don’t worry, chaps, I have a plan. You set up some limited companies, and we ‘invest’ in them in lieu of salary.
[Collective sound of gum-guard-sucking.]
Wrigel Nay: I’ll have my people contact your people to explain it all. [Drones on until everyone falls asleep.]
On the telly this week
Friday 8th November
| Connacht 11 – 42 Leinster | 19:35 | TG4 / Premier Sports 2 |
| Edinburgh 20 – 17 Dragons | 19:35 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Sale 28 – 18 Wasps | 19:45 | BT Sport 1 |
Saturday 9th November
| France 10 – 20 England (women) | 13:10 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Gloucester 12 – 21 Saracens | 15:00 | BT Sport 2 |
| Zebre 7 – 31 Glasgow | 15:00 | Free Sports |
| Ospreys 14 – 16 Kings | 15:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Cardiff 30 – 17 Cheetahs | 17:15 | Premier Sports 1* / S4C |
| Munster 22 – 16 Ulster | 17:15 | Premier Sports 1* |
| Scarlets 20 – 11 Treviso | 19:35 | Premier Sports 1 |
*Both of these cannot be right. But that’s what the site says.
Sunday 3rd November
| Exeter 17 – 22 Bristol | 15:00 | BT Sport 2 |
Ovally Balls 
Arf. On the fixture list for the streams here the Os were translated into the Fischadlers. And quite right to.
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I did issue a warning about Allen Clarke.
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Poor old Hooky.
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These long advantages are pure bollocks.
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Duly achieved.
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Here we go. We’ve had some great days and some minging days in Thomond Park. Mostly It’s neither. Beaten without too much fuss but still retaining some basic respect.
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Clearest red card you’ll ever see in the Blues game
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Yep, that was fierce, FBC.
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What happened?
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I’m expecting Rush on Lewes except featuring a bazooka. Script a homage to 70s thrillers.
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Lawes.
I got a new phone recently and its autocorrect is shameful.
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Cheetahs 8 sort of winds up his shoulder and then whacks Jason Tovey in the head trying to clear him out
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Haha it’s no Rush on Lawes, more stupid than potentially lethal
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Thomond is a tough place to play if you aren’t in a Munster shirt. I missed all but the last five minutes of that first half due to spagbol duties for later
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POM lineout monster is back
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Ticht – yep. Bastard picks now to turn it on.
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Roddy Grant doing the duties for Ulster is just wrong
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Good score from Ulster, mind
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YES!
And what a kick from Cooney there.
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Heads up, Aldi Argentinian Malbec, it’s a winner for sick squid
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Mon Ulster
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Funny how things work out, I remember saying Ulster would be really hurting without Pienaar, but Cooney would not have made so much progress without Ruan moving on, top top player now
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Yep, he’s really good, and keeps getting better. Enzo predicted it!
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I got lost in the rucksy dropsy thing, I had no idea what was happening and who was advocating what, but generally I find myself in agreement with Enzo
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Brilliant from Conway but he shouldn’t be getting through that first tackle
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… or the second, nor the third!
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Looking through other scores, Sarries probably silenced the Shed this afternoon
Callum Hunter-Hill on the Sarries bench again, rumour is he was a naughty boy in Edinburgh, late night drinking and stuff, and so was packed off to London for the season. That finally makes sense because he is a huge prospect.
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Good job there’s no pubs or clubs in That London then…..
I did spot that he’d come on for the last few minutes, so he is getting the occasional few minutes now and again. Maybe Sarries thought Hunter-Hill was another Private Company?
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Ah well. A LBP was more than I was expecting.
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Respect intact. I’d probably have taken a point beforehand. Enough energy to win, not enough quality.
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BB, he started last week, overall he’s had a mix of lots and little game time with them. I guess he’ll go back into the academy, which is where he was assigned when he went there, now that the Euro big cup games are coming up.
He is a future Scotland lock, as good as Ritchie in a different position. I’m looking forward to him returning to Embra a better player and more focused as a person from the experience
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*finds himself in general agreement with Enzo*
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This is brilliant:
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My daughter’s boyfriend just popped round, they are going to a pop up restaurant tonight, run by a friend of theirs.
Daughter’s boyfriend is training to be a sommelier, the hotel he works in has, well he has recently served the likes of Eddie Jones and Bruce Springsteen, he doesn’t tell tales but tells me when he has served people he knows I will be interested in.
Anyway, the chef tonight is a friend of thiers, he is Michelin starred, apparently.
I’m being told this as I put the linguine in the pot for the spagbol.
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“Don’t fool around with those Scotchmen. They’re tough babies.”
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Think I’d probably prefer your spag bol to a Michelin starred meal. Hell, I’d probably prefer a certain llama’s cheese on toast to a Michelin starred meal.
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I’d like to try it once, BB
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Never had llama’s cheese.
Might have to go to a Michelin-starred restaurant to get it, who knows.
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That’s not real, Sandy would have put the heid on that guy after about two words – the old dandruff decider
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@ticht
Should have poured him a Kestrel
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Ha, here is one for Thaum.
Teddy, son of Richard Thompson, going full George Jones country.
One of the great things about that Transatlantic Sessions show was that the performers could pick anyone else on the series to be in their band for the song they wanted to perform, so Teddy gets a stellar backing singer lineup of Aoife O’Donovan, Juile Fowlis, Karen Matheson and Mary Chapin Carpenter.
He also gets Aly Bain on fiddle and Jerry Douglas on Dobro, plus Danny Thompson on bass, I won’t go on, save for Russ Barrenberg on guitar – that is a superstar lineup by any standard
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Julie Fowlis is just about the sweetest person you will ever meet, she really is lovely. She is a terrific bagpiper as well as singer and whistle player. Here she is doing Puirt-À-Beul which is Gaelic for “mouth music” – tongue twister lyrics in the Gaelic language which is music itself
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‘Roddy Grant doing the duties for Ulster is just wrong’
Thieving. Norn. Gibbons.
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Had a couple of Michelin starred meals. Very nice, but cost a frigging fortune.
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Ticht posting about the Transatlantic Sessions is jogging my memory of YouTube clips. Here’s one
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Great stuff OT. I was listening to an old radio 4 thing the other day, Johnny Cash had a chance meeting with a Scottish couple at an airport and as a result traced his ancestors to a wee town in Fife. So Cash visited the place several times and befriended several of the locals. Apparently he was driving the local countryside and came across this guy who had had a puncture, he took the guy to the local garage to get the puncture repaired (no spare) and drove him back up to his car and helped him put the wheel back on. He drove off only introducing himself to the guy as “John”. The bloke was none the wiser, until much later.
This was in the 70s.
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My cheese on toast is not Michelin starred. Just to clarify.
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Transatlantic Sessions was a brilliant programme. Although I think they lost something when they moved from the Perthshire house to Loch Lomond side (where that one was filmed). Dunno, the older place seemed more atmospheric somehow, which added to the programme.
This was filmed in the old bit…
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And this one
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OK. Don’t know what happened there – I could watch the video fine.
Try this one.
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