With Six Nations on the horizon, OvallyBalls operatives have been sharpening their pencils (and their rapier-like wits).
Enzo’s Ireland squad
I’ll make tough choices and keep it to a lean-ish 36/37. However, I will do honourable mentions. The players will be in order from best to rest, where applicable. I’ll explain otherwise.
LHP: Healy, Kilcoyne, McGrath – JMcG has found a bit of form although the first two are miles ahead. Nods to Buckley and Eric O’Sullivan.
HK: Kelleher, Herring, Scannell – fuck it, chuck the kid in, he looks fantastic. Failing that it has to be Herring over Scannell.
THP: Furlong, Porter, O’Toole – first two miles ahead, pick themselves. O’Toole is not the third best THP in Ireland, John Ryan and Marty Moore are both better and, if it comes to starting a big game, they should leapfrog TO’T. But he has huge potential and should be in the group.
SR: Ryan, Henderson, Beirne, Kleyn – first two a good bit ahead. Beirne’s form has dipped a bit. Big Dev and Dillane and Roux are all fine but none have form that’s compelling enough to get rid of Kleyn, who has been good and put in one awesome performance against Sarries, which is hard to ignore. Still shouldn’t necessarily play, however.
BR: van der Flier, Doris, Stander, Ruddock, Connors, Deegan, O’Donoghue – no POM, he’s been shit for a year, everyone talks about his leadership so it’s time to have a word with himself and find some form. No room for sentiment. He’s not even next man in, Sean Reidy is the unluckiest guy to not make Enzo’s definitive group. First three would be my starters. Doris has to play.
SH: Cooney, Murray, Blade – self explanatory.
OH: Sexton, Ross Byrne, Burns – JS is still our best ten by miles, until Harry Byrne takes the shirt off him. Carbery would be ahead of Burns (definitely) and Byrne (probably? maybe? maybe not, actually) if fit. I’m as surprised as anyone to be pencilling in Billy Burns and, if Carty wasn’t playing like shit and Hanrahan was a bit more fit, I’d probably not have him.
CT: Ringrose, McCloskey, Henshaw, Aki – Chris Farrell and Luke Marshall are the unluckiest, maybe Tom Farrell too (injuries took away any chance he had). Ringrose is our best centre and my issue with him is that someone needs to tell him the expectation is that he’ll be the best in the world, or thereabouts, for the next few years so time to start playing like it. Given his form since the WC, maybe that conversation took place. McCloskey has been awesome for Ulster and, given we lack a massive carrier in the pick, I think should take the shirt. Henshaw however has been playing well. Aki is Aki, nearly always fit (an underrated quality) and solid.
B3: Stockdale, Larmour, Conway, Lowe, Addison – no Earls is the big news but he’s 32 and even if he wasn’t I’d not have him ahead of these guys. They all play wing and at least four play full back but, IMO, it’s Larmour at 15 with Addison behind him, while Stockdale and Conway are on the wings, although Lowe has to get some time there too.
Chimpie’s Scotland squad
LH: Dell? Bhatti? Sutherland? Our options here are un-good, none of whom are really first picks anywhere. would include Reid but he’s languishing in super-6 land. Need Kebble to qualify pronto.
Hooker: Brown, McInally, Turner. In that order currently although Rambo & Brown are pretty much interchangeable.
TH: Z-Fags, Nel, Bergs. zander has been on good form of late. Wullie can still scrum but otherwise looks a little off the pace.
Lock: Gray (smaller), Cummins, Gilchrist & Toolis. Skinner may be back up to speed soon in which case I’d have him in, no real idea what larger Gray is up to. if on form I’d include him.
Back row: Bradbury, Ritchie, Watson, M-Fags, Thomson. I’m sure Toonie will add Wilson. I’d have Crosbie in there too.
SH: Price, Horne, errr….. Pyrgos? Not much else in the cupboard really. SHC is odd-jobbing in France. Shiel looks good but hasn’t had may pro starts. Glasgow appear to have unearthed a fetus of potentially great talent but bit early to tell.
FH: Finn, Hastings. Behind that the cupboard is somewhat bare. I’d give Weir a chance, but others seem to think Horne is a 10. Yes he can do a brief job there but he’s not an international 10.
Centre. Jones, Scott, Hutchinson, Taylor, Johnson, Bennett, Harris all in the mix, could be a contentious area. They’re all regular starters, difficult to know who to leave out. would personally cut to Jones, Scott, Hutch & Taylor but who knows. Horne will probably make it.
Back 3: Hogg, Graham, Maitland, Kinghorn, McGuigan
Yosoy’s Wales squad
LH: Wyn Jones, Carré, Evans – Smith sucks so doesn’t make the cut, Carré can’t get a game, Evans is miles off last year’s form and Wyn Jones is serviceable. Overall rating: weak
Hooker: Ken, Dee, Elias – fine. Overall rating: tidy
TH: Dillz, Brown, WillGriff John – Guess work here as WG John is getting talked up and I only remember him as a powder puff scrummager that was Scott Andrews-lite. Dillz has played once since the RWC, Fatty Francis is too fat to play (injured, truthfully) and Brown is an awful technician in the tight. Overall rating: piss weak
Locks: President Jones, Beard, Ball, BAILLCH (British and Irish Lions Legend Cory Hill) – fine, same bunch as last year. Overall rating: half-tidy
Back row: Taulupe, Wainwright, Tipuric, Navidi, Shingler, Moriarty, Griffiths – Pivac is picking Shingler whether Iksy likes it or not. The starters should be Taulupe, Wainwright + 1. If they’re going to pick an 8th ‘rower, then pick Basham who’s a proper hard twonk. Griffiths makes Warburton look durable but Pivac was talking him up so…. overall rating: better than 10 Superbowls. Better than 19 Superbowls if Ellis comes back okay next season
SH: Tomos, Davies, G & whoever. Don’t care. Pick Tomos and sit back. overall rating: tidy
The Tenz: Everyone loves Dan Biggar, Jarrod, Sam Davies – not great. Can’t really play Turkball with Biggar, can’t trust Jarrod. overall rating: worrying
Centrez: Parkesy and whoever else is standing. Probably Scott Williams, Watkin will make some of the 6N. Too early for Benny T. Tyler Morgan looks done, wouldn’t surprise me to see Adams play 13 v Italy. overall rating: let’s not talk about it
Wingz: Adams, North, Lane Train, McTurkle, Amos Exprezz – overall rating: choo choo
FB: Halfpenny, Liam might be fit? – overall rating: good to tidy
MisterIks begs to differ in some respects.
Further reading
Chimpie’s synopsis of the Pro-Woo standings
Yosoy on Alun Wyn Jones and the woeful state of the Ospreys
Tichtheid on the Scottish looseheid predicament
On the telly this week
Friday 10th January
| Bath 19 – 25 Harlequins | 19:45 | BT Sport 2 |
| La Rochelle 30 – 23 Sale | 19:45 | BT Sport 3 |
Saturday 11th January
| Bordeaux 32 – 17 Edinburgh | 12:45 | epcrugby.com |
| Ospreys 15 – 22 Saracens | 13:00 | Channel 4 / BT Sport 2 |
| Clermont 29 – 13 Ulster | 13:00 | BT Sport 3 |
| Calvisano 19 – 47 Pau | 13:30 | epcrugby.com |
| Castres 42 – 14 Dragons | 14:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Agen 24 – 52 Wasps | 14:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Stade Français-24 – 29 Zebre | 14:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Worcester 66 – 10 Enisei-STM | 15:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Bristol 52 – 3 Brive | 15:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Glasgow 31 – 31 Exeter | 15:15 | BT Sport 2 |
| Connacht 7 – 21 Toulouse | 15:15 | BT Sport 3 |
| Bayonne 27 – 10 London Irish | 16:00 | epcrugby.com |
| Gloucester 29 – 6 Montpellier | 17:30 | BT Sport 2 |
| Scarlets 15 – 27 Toulon | 20:00 | S4C / BT Sport 2 |
Sunday 12th January
| Northampton 33 – 20 Treviso | 13:00 | BT Sport 2 |
| Leinster 42 – 14 Lyon | 13:00 | BT Sport 3 |
| Racing 92 39 – 22 Munster | 15:15 | BT Sport 2 |
| Leicester 30 – 20 Cardiff | 15:15 | epcrugby.com |
Ovally Balls 
Might be able to deny Sarries the four try bonus point here.
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utna, watched a second or two of the Ospreys game and saw the try. The female commentator is Nolli Waterman, an England legend.
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@Dab
Probably a good case for it. He’s been trying to get a rise out of him all afternoon and 15 v 13 is the best chance the Ospreys have.
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@Tomp – watch a second or two more then will you.
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@Tomp
I presume she is related to Lawrence Dallaglio? For, of all the commentators I have ever heard, only big Lol is worse
I am aware of the work of Stuart Barnes, Phil Kearns and Scott Hastings and I have taken them into account in that assessment
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@cmw
Dan Evans is definitely the best Ospreys fullback called Evans.
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Do you remember a geezeer called Jim Waterman who played for Bath in the 1970s and early 80s, just before Barnes and all them started? He’s her dad.
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@Yos – Shane’s just praised him for is impact in the Carre red card incident. His ability to be shouldered in the head could come in useful at the higher level.
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Obviously Wainwright has being elbowed covered, but we need someone in for those ‘no arms’ hits.
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Brother of Dennis?
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@Yosoy I’ve not seen a lot of him playing since the World Cup, but a bit of niggle seems to have crept into his game over the past year. Just seems unnecessary to me, although being such a senior and respected player he seems to get away with it.
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” I’ve not seen a lot of him playing since the World Cup”
I don’t think anyone has.
Liam Williams winding up Manu, the whole Welsh team pulling Sinckler’s chain, Jake Ball on Faf. It’s becoming a thing with our brave heroes.
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“I’ve not seen a lot of him playing since the World Cup,”
You and everyone else.
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@TomP – Dan Evans setting off Sarries super-star prop baby – definitely needs a call up.
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Parra misses an early penalty in the second half.
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@Tomp players in all colours will do it while they are getting away with it. I’d very much like to see a crackdown on unsportsmanlike behaviour by referees.
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Evans in again.
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Gah, we are getting monstered in the scrum.
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North’s been passing a lot. Mostly OK though not always coming off, but I guess he’s trying to showcase his skillz.
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Ulster scrum failure leads to some Clermont pressure.
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Raka scores in the corner.
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Nonsense. He’s always been niggly – same as POC, Johnson and all before him.
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Enough pressure to yield try.
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DE could have been in for a third then.
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Raka juuusst touches the line on the left side.
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Awful by Morgan. All he had to do was straighten, draw and pass. But he goes outside and throws a space ball pass.
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The pass hit the Sarries player so wasn’t as bad as it looked, but yeah, not good.
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Moore & Addison have gone off injured.
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That’s not a good try to concede.
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And that was nearly a worse one. What was AWJ doing there in the corner?
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@Yosoy I never thought of AWJ or POC as niggly. Johnson was plain violent rather than niggly!
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Ulster very close to scoring a try, but play stopped for a (very nasty-looking) injury to the Clermont 12.
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Wales-Ireland games are always niggly, POC definitely involved in his share of that.
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Dan Evans had a shaky few minutes, might need the hat-trick now to get the man of the match award that was looking nailed on.
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AWJ saves another try in the corner.
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But he’s still playing.
(I winched when they showed the replay of the knee twisting.)
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Clermont give away a pen in front of the posts, which Cooney slots.
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Doggy-bone: I know! Unbelievable!
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Then I don’t know who is if those two aren’t.
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Which Ulster player just played the ball off the ground ?
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Laidlaw about to step onto the pitch for Clermont.
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Clermont get a penalty back. Parra now being replaced by Wee Greig.
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AWJ having a rest now, well played. Aled Davies has come on and straight away makes a break in response to Yosoy’s (deserved) slight earlier on.
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Parra’s kick is good.
19-13
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Lloyd Ashley for AWJ is like bringing on a 3 day old kitten for Hercules.
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Not going to be winning this one.
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Gulp. 5m scrum to Clermont.
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And Ulster empty their bench, including replacing Cooney.
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Walesonline have ejaculated more jizz on Dan Evans than the whole of Wales did on North during Georgie’s glistening years.
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Cooney’s been good again but Clermont have targeted him for a battering and induced a few mistakes from him,
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