IRELAND: No Backspace
A brief, incomprehensive preview of Ireland’s Six Nations 2020, written fast
Having muffed the entire last calendar year, Irish rugby returns to Europe feeling sorry for itself. The normal provincial success continues, but means nothing come the bitter dawn of the first weekend of February. It’s Six Nations time.
Daddy Faz is our new leader and he’s talked a lot of fan-service shite about how we’ll be a pure-running Irish team, ferocious and feral and flames for eyes. His actual vision for the side will get its first public airing this weekend. Many of the personnel are the same as the World Cup – too many, in a particular rather than strategic sense – but this still represents a period of major change.
Yet change is not to be feared. The history of Ireland at Rugby World Cups shows that a constant state of flux is, paradoxically, needed to maintain standards as well as develop them. 2019 was as clear an example as 2007 of the desiccated horror of trying to take a successful side that has just hit a peak and shield it from the passage of time. The only ways to stop a tiger changing daily are death and taxidermy.
And, so, we come to another paradox. Minimal changes of personnel at this time are not necessarily expressions of fear of that which is new. We could have bucked out everyone over the age of 30 – but we’re not picking the 2023 World Cup team in January 2020. We must be prepared to keep evolving in perpetuity. No need for do-something panic now.
This weekend’s team:
Spuds: Healy, Herring, Furlong, Henderson, Ryan, Stander, van der Flier, Doris
Gravy: Murray, Sexton, Stockdale, Aki, Ringrose, Conway, Larmour
Seconds: Kelleher, Kilcoyne, Porter, Toner, O’Mahony, Cooney, Ross Byrne, Henshaw
Johnny Sexton is the captain, and this is OK. He remains our best ten by a way and is one of a handful of nailed-on starters. If there is an issue with his captaincy, it’s not his age or his ability – it’s his captaincy. The key part of the job is dealing with the ref and, while he seems a charming and self-effacing man when in his civvies, game-day Johnny Sexton is an insufferable wanker. He makes enemies of the whistlers and, while recently he has tried smiling and coercion (and looked unnatural doing so), he’s only one perceived affront away from calling Romain Poîte a brainless snaildick. Contrast with your memories of perfect-son-in-law Sam Warburton and the issue is clear.
Conor Murray’s selection is a poor call. Conor of the past 12 months or so is not the champion player of the years prior. He’s not been bad, per se, and his imperiousness may still return. The issue is alternatives. John Cooney has been the most influential player in Europe this year.
Peter O’Mahony has been unshovellable shite for a year and the fact he made the Six Nations squad at all should have been questioned. Overall, his previous body of work makes that the right call – but picking him in a match-day 23 is frankly the wrong choice. The starting back row looks well-balanced, and chucking 21-year-old Doris straight in barely feels like a risk. However, Max Deegan or Jack O’Donoghue should be on the bench – with the choice of which made on a tactical and stylistic basis rather than trying to decide which of the two great athletes in great form best deserve the number 20 shirt.
Anyway, it’s just one weekend. The variable calls:
- which of four centres gets to play beside Ringrose?
- Larmour or Addison, or maybe both?
- the selected front rows look like our best six, but each of the calls could go either way – do we have a best front row, and do we even need a clear starting trio?
And so we will have room to breathe over the course of the tournament. A tournament we can win (we won’t, England will).
Now is the time for experimentation, to a point. But Andy Farrell does not get a free hit. Anything less than three wins is failure and, ultimately, we’re in it to win it.
Scotland by 50.
ENDS
Preview courtesy of EnzoM
WALES: The Dog That Didn’t Know Whether to be Under or Over
With apologies to Edmund Spenser:
One day they wrote his name upon the sheet,
But at night I came and washed it all away.
Again they wrote it in media and tweet
But in I crept, and made the twittering my prey.
Vain man! cried they, to wipe his name away
A frightening act, a cruel spine-tingler
To ensure Wayne Pivac forgets Aaron Shingler
Link to Squad for the 2020 Guinness Six Nations
Team to play Italy in Cardiff:
Leigh Halfpenny; Johnny McNicholl, George North, Hadleigh Parkes, Josh Adams; Dan Biggar, Tomos Williams; Wyn Jones, Ken Owens, Dillon Lewis, Jake Ball, Alun Wyn Jones (capt), Aaron Wainwright, Justin Tipuric, Taulupe Faletau.
Replacements: Ryan Elias, Rob Evans, Leon Brown, Cory Hill, Ross Moriarty, Rhys Webb, Jarrod Evans, Nick Tompkins.
Endings & Beginnings
As Wales sings Po Atarau / Now is the Hour to bid a fond farewell to Warren Gatland and Shaun Edwards, and a jauntier ‘I’ll Bet you a Kangaroo’ to help Howley hop off, the mood in the Heimat is unexpectedly optimistic.
Wayne Pivac seems to have seamlessly sewn himself into Warren’s catsuit, sorry tracksuit, and the players have gone through the four stages of post-RWC grief faster than a Greased-Zammit down a slippurly slurp℠.
Rather than the sour reek of sweaty anxiety, there’s the fresh morning air of new dawns and bright horizons. Players appear well-rested and happy to be in the new coaching set-up, and the injuries are not casting long shadows over the squad, even though some top players and Handsome Legends are missing.
But…
It’s in times like these that Wales can turn in some honking performances, especially in their opening 6N encounters at home, when all the optimism and expectation dissolves into blunt, turgid attack and weak, chaotic defence. Home cheers fade into murmurings about the bloody roof being open. Or closed.
But fair’s fair, a good old underdogging seems inappropriate, so like a Frankfurter in a bap I will settle for some in-between dogging followed by complete fantasy with my forecasts.
Saturday’s Match vs Italy
Wales have opted for a solid start, fielding an experienced line-up and just one new cap. We’ve flirted with North at 13 before and not much happened, good or bad. These days George is a more seasoned and moderate player, no longer the impetuous young buck throwing homophobes over his shoulder for fun. George has never been great positionally, but I hope his experience and maturity nails the position down for the duration of the Championship.
McNicholl is the only first-capper and Halfpenny’s selection at 15 is a wise move, so we should see some exciting counterattacking running from our Welsh Johnny. Let’s hope it doesn’t lead to a lot of turnovers because his teammates can’t keep up.
Wales are likely to creak in the scrum, but lineouts should be efficient enough with Tipuric and Wainwright doing a lot of the leaping at the tail. As great as it is to see Faletau back, I’m not getting carried away as it is still a long way back to his 2015 Lions Tour form and fitness.
Ball will no doubt go about his ball-carrying like a pig snouts truffle, but he makes some hard yards and plenty of tackles. AWJ will hopefully be his niggly, majestic self and lead from the front.
Prediction: a stuttering 23-11 Wales victory.
Round 2. Away to Ireland
Our first away match is against Ireland, and the Irish look like tournament favourites with both a strong team littered with in-form players, and the desire to lay to rest their World Cup ghosts and memories.
Unfortunately, Scotland seem determined to undermine their own chances in the opener against Ireland, so Wales will be up against a green wave of Grand Slam expectation.
Prediction: a brave effort but a narrow 29-23 Welsh defeat.
Fantasy Rugby 1. Home to France
I think France are really fed-up of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory against Wales, and this will be a big match for them. Time to unburden some true Welsh pessimism and imagine the worst.
After a bruising encounter in Dublin, Faletau leaves for an early Bath with another broken arm-bone. North and Halfpenny haven’t recovered from their HIAs and Greased-Zammit starts on the wing with Welsh Johnny switching to full back. Pivac has his full ‘Welsh Way’ moment and picks Willowy Shingler at 6, drafts Owen Williams into inside centre to replace a stolid Mr. Glue, with Bury my Heart at Watkin’s Knee selected at OC.
Big Dan Biggar spends the entire match kicking grubbers into the French in-goal area for Zammit to chase like a spaniel. France score five breakaway tries and Owen Williams reveals his wonky temperament by being red carded for scramming Fickou in the face during a touchline tussle.
Prediction: Wales lose 13-49 and Barry John calls for Pivac to be replaced by Rob Howley
Fantasy Rugby 2. The Miracle in Twickenham
After the madness in Cardiff, normal service is resumed and Wales return to full strength, except for Faletau. Halfpenny and North are recalled, and Liam starts on the wing. Wainwright replaces Shingles, and a fired-up Moriarty comes in at 8.
England are marching towards a Slam after victories over France, Scotland, and the BIG ONE against Ireland. Eddie is basking in a contract extension until 2027, making him the best paid coach in RU history.
After 60 minutes England are winning comfortably without stretching away. Pivac plays his joker and turns to his Dragons on the bench. Dee for Owens, Brown for Lewis, Hill for Ball, and squad replacement Tyler Morgan for wee Georgie North.
My-oh-my, what a comeback. A brace from Brown and a classic outside break from Morgan brings the score back to within one point. Greased-Zammit enters the fray while England are camped on the Welsh 5-metre line with 5 minutes to go.
A re-set scrum and Dee strikes against the head! Tomos feeds Biggar who feigns a touch-kick but slips a pass to Morgan. A step sends Billy V into Row C, creating space to free Zammit! Zammit scorches the length of the field to score like a Welsh Andy Hancock – in half the time.
Prediction: England 21-25 Wales
Fantasy Rugby 3. Highland Flings in Cardiff
After their surprise win against France, new Scottish Player-Coach Finn Russell selects the same team while captaining the side for the second time. Wales are also unchanged.
Both sides are committed to playing high-risk running rugby under a closed roof. Madness ensues, and the game ends 49-all, while breaking all records for the highest number of knock-ons ever recorded in an international rugby match. Finn invites both sides for a celebratory night out in Newport, where more pints are spilled than consumed. News comes in from Scotland that Toony and Hoggy have eloped. Jim Telfer’s neck explodes.
Preview courtesy of MisterIks
On the telly this week (SIX NATIONS!!!)
Friday 31st January
| Blues v Chiefs | 06:05 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Brumbies v Reds | 08:15 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Sharks v Bulls | 17:10 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Ireland U20 v Scotland U20 | 19:15 | YouTube / RTÉ TWO |
| Wales U20 v Italy U20 | 19:35 | S4C |
Saturday 1st February
| Sunwolves v Melbourne Rebels | 03:45 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Crusaders v Waratahs | 06:05 | Sky Sports Mix |
| Stormers v Hurricanes | 13:05 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Wales v Italy | 14:15 | BBC One / S4C |
| Cheetahs v Southern Kings | 15:00 | Freesports |
| Ireland v Scotland | 16:45 | ITV |
| France U20 v England U20 | 20:00 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Los Jaguares v Lions | 23:00 | Sky Sports Mix |
Sunday 2nd February
| France v England (women) | 12:30 | Sky Sports Mix |
| Exeter v Harlequins | 13:00 | BT Sport 2 |
| Wales v Italy (women) | 13:00 | BBC Two Wales |
| Ireland v Scotland (women) | 13:00 | BBC Alba / red button |
| France v England | 15:00 | BBC One |
Ovally Balls 
look at all those options.
We can;’t find an 8, 9 or 12 in the whole of England.
We’re fecked.
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Pfft
Anyhoo, think Jones will make any changes for next week?
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& Ticht I’d go for the same back row next week. Watson & Ritchie are our two best, and Haining did enough to suggest he can cut it. Is he going to be a Marfo or around longer term? Dunno, but the question is who is on the pine. I’d guess Bradbury but would not be unhappy with Crosbie
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Dova, if Saturday i anythng to go by we’ll batter you up to the 75m mark, then cough up possession.
England’s scrum went very well yesterday, and whilst ours was on top you never really know where you are until the two packs meet in anger. I have doubts about the temperament of a few of the English lads, Genge, Sinkler and Itoje for starters, they don’t like it up ’em and if we can match England’s power game we could be in the hunt
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Alun Wyn? Well, he might combover in the other direction to mix it up a bit.
Keep the Irish guessing.
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Nice words Larry and Iks. Missed all the weekend’s rugger viewing while on a birthday weekend in Denver with the missus – her’s not mine.
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Should we see changes? Yes x100
Will we? No, because our coach is stubborn and pig-headed when the pressure comes on.
Can see a proper meltdown brewing, probably with bonus fighting between team members and probably a red card for someone – you just feel it’s building and going to explode in a proper doing (on the scale of the 30-3). If it’s not this week it’ll come against one of Wales or Ireland.
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I doubt England will be as bad next weekend.
This all has me quite concerned though. we know where we are being nailed on underdogs but we’ve retained the Calcutta cup and have a misfiring England visiting. We should be competitive in this match but these portents point to a classic Scotland meltdown.
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At that level, it must be hard to admit you got it wrong in selections, and the temptation – as ever – is to “double down”.
We had a few wins/losses in experimentation at our U14 team – played an openside at 13 thinking his abrasive tackling would help defensively – it did but we ended up with our 13 hitting every ruck, and never in the backline.
Played a 2nd row at 12 – this worked as he’s a good enough tackler and runs straight in possession.
Played a lad with excellent catching skills at fullback – not a success …he wasn’t quick enough and few U14 teams kick much high ball in – more likely to kick long and chase.
Played a 13 at 6 – worked …excellent tackler and evasive runner and he never passes anyway so he might as well run straight and let the others ruck over him once he’s been tackled rather than killing backline moves by ignoring overlaps.
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I think England will be worse. A lot worse. The rot has set in now with 2 defeats on the trot and I genuinely can’t see where the next win is coming from. Maybe in June when the Barbarians rock up out of their minds after a week in Wetherspoons.
I’d love to see them do well, but I can only see infighting, Farrell in a brown leather jacket and Mike Catt being given the top job in their near future.
A shame.
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Pfft
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It’s a must win for both Scotland and England on Saturday. Whoever loses will be out of the running and hoping not to trip up against Italy to avoid the spoon as the other remaining games are tough.
Grim.
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rumour has it Finn needs to apologise before he’s allowed back.
Get on with it ya bam. At least be back in camp before the Italy game.
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Trying to force someone to apologise to rejoin the group sounds a bit too hammer / nut. Is there anything going on between Finntastic and Cpt. Hoggwash regarding leadership / status?
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Difficult to say, ‘evidence’ seems to point to something between the team and not-so-finnocent and / or GT
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Frankly I’m going to be fuming if they can’t sort it out. I’m sure that’ll focus everyone’s minds
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possibly with a side order of outrage
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I’m not dismissing pffts as an option either.
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Don’t think there’s any wrong between Finn and Hoggy. Folk seem to forget that senior players were involved in trying to get Finn to stop, and to stay in the group, it wasn’t only Toonie. Hoggy would have been one, but probably all his ex-Glasgow teammates would have been there too.
Wee Greig and Finn are close apparently, maybe he needs to have a word.
Also, apart from THAT, don’t think Hoggy did too much wrong as captain on Saturday.
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How to do a midfield maul:
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Look at Foxy there. Gone from best midfielder in Europe to Nicky T’s understudy in less than 40 minutes of rugby.
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Any Quins/Exeter/other fans know anything about Stan South?
He’s just been signed on a short term loan by Edinburgh, I hear he is a young lock, but that’s all I know
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Just found out I’m Top Of The ‘Bru Log!
The only way is down!
And that will prolly happen pretty quickly after this weekend…..
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He played in the England Under 20 team that won the World Cup in 2016, ticht. Pretty good, not massively tall.
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It’s quite something, and it is the case, that 6ft5in or 1.96m isn’t considered tall now, especially for a lock – it’s the height AWJ is listed at – having said that, of course all height and weight stats are to be taken with a pinch of salt
This signing does make me think that Callum Hunter-Hill’s days at Edinburgh are well and truly over, word is that they love him down at Sarries, since he went there “on loan”, he won’t cost them much and he’ll get a lot of game time in the Championship whilst Kruis and Itoje rest their bones
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Those 2 will surely be off ticht? England are well and truly stuffed if half our team play at that level, or not at all, for a season.
Having said that, when we got relegated ( different as were just shit) we unearthed a couple of top internationals, Ashton for one.
The big names need new clubs bit maybe we’ll see the benefit of some youngsters coming through their system in a few years having played full seasons of tough, if low standard, rugby.
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He’s tall, just not massively tall.
Here’s a neat pass in the Under 20 final:
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Dova, one of the pundits over the weekend, it might have been Dylz, said that the big names will get a rest next year that they never would normally, and that it could well prolong their career.
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I’ve got this, I’ve got this, picked an angle, running at good speed, targeting the weak should … what the fucking hell was that?
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I dont see it. Prolong their careers maybe but not at the same level. I simply cant imagine them going between turning out for a few games of 2nd teir rugby in front of 50 people to a test match in front of 80000 against players that have been playing top level domestic and European rugby all season.
There is rest, which is in too short supply for all england players (all top level rugby players to be fair) and then there is atrophy.
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Tomp, that is brutal.
I’d be dead before hitting the floor if someone tackled me like that.
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Malindr looked like he enjoyed that. A few familiar names in that games, but I just had a look and see Joe Marchant has gone off to join AVS’s team in Super Rugby.
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A trophy. Atrophy? Am I spelling that right or even using the right word.
Like what happens to you leg muscles after 3 months in a cast not being used.
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Plus a Lions tour at the end of the season.
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oofya, that is what you’d call a tackle.
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Joe Marchant’s Welsh-qualified. Could have been a contender.
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What was the story with Marchant, then, was he injured or just not getting games at Quins?
It’s rugby have him at 15, 19 and 20 league game for the last three seasons before this, all but one of them starts
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It’s a loan deal. He wanted a look at Super Rugby and Harlequins have got the connections. A few players ahead of him at outside centre (though falling injured rapidly). Good luck to him.
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Stan South:
https://www.exeterchiefs.co.uk/players/stan-south
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Stan South, George North, Burt East and Albert West. I blame Brexit.
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England carrying on without a specialist number 8 or specialist inside centre. And probably persisting with Daly. Dear oh dear. We can all see it’s idiotic. Selection is a head coach’s first job and he’s failing.
Plus, why the hell are we changing attack coach mid-season??
Jones oot!
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@dab
Nick Evans suggests that’s the main reason England were shite on Sunday:
https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2020/feb/03/england-in-transition-good-enough-recover-france-loss
Although it doesn’t explain why Faz kept dropping the ball and the defence was all doggy.
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Faz crunched his ribs or was winded prior to those first half fumbles, maybe he was still wincing.
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“…why the hell are we changing attack coach mid-season??”
I dunno, I sometimes get the impression England try to find that elusive top 2 inches from outside the set-up, like a silver bullet that will finally get them to the Promised Land.
Yours truly,
Iksy’s Mixed Metaphors.
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Owen obviously isn’t as hard as his Dad.
https://media.gettyimages.com/photos/andrew-farrell-the-wigan-captain-looks-on-after-breaking-his-nose-picture-id50977656?s=594×594
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Try this one
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Nick Evans being far too kind to England players and coaches in my humble………………………..
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I now have total hopefear re the Calcutta cup. Two weeks ago I was in the pits regarding the FR nonsense, now I’m just mildly annoyed about it, few of Saturday’s errors would have been resolved had he been on the park (which isn’t to say mindset might have been different, and he could have turned on a moment of magic, but hey, the game that happened is the game that happened).
Scotland could well fix those errors and then it’s a case of which England shows up, the NZ version or the one like last week. Is EJ going to play players out of position again? It’s a farce playing Curry at 8 when he’s one of the best 7s around.
I’m hoping for a narrow Scotland win but now fearing a collective brainfart and a cricket score by England.
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England have lost 5 of their last 7 6N away games apparently.
Be nice if we can make it 6 of 8 keep the Calcutta Cup but I’ve got a bad feeling about this.
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Curry could (should) play as he does when wearing 7 (or the 6 he wore in the World Cup).It’s more about his lack of skill at the base of the scrum. Even the ball at the end when Heinz got tackled by Dupont was down to Curry’s poor control. I felt sorry for him being put into such a difficult situation by Jones.
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