
quite possibly weeks or longer.
Having left Matadi and a newly enriched Customs Officer, we drove back on the Kinshasa road to Lufu, or any of the other names that towns in this part of Africa get called, depending on your language and which side of the border you nominally originate from. Lufu gets its name from the Lufu River, which runs from northern Angola to the Congo River (presumably) traversing the sliver of land that King Leopold managed to get to ensure that his colony had access to the sea. It’s less a town on the Congolese side and more of a crazy, uncontrolled (to the unfamiliar eye) trading post, where commodities ranging from cement and rebar to beer, plastic products, clothes and bulk food items, are traded across borders depending on exchange rates, availability, who you’re paying off and whether you’ve fuel in your truck (or motorbike for the micro-traders) to make it to Kinshasa.
Mo spent a good deal of the journey speaking to his boss and explaining the loss of US$800 and whether it was worth approaching their friend, the head of police in Kinshasa, to try to get it back. It was decided that route would be more costly in the longer run. “You sleep in shitty hotel tonight!” roared Mo laughing away, because we had to overnight in the nearby town of Kimpese in order to finish our investigation after the delays.

Kimpese is more hamlet than town, more shithole (thanks Dumb Donald!) than hamlet, with a handful of streets of formal houses and potholed dirt roads hidden behind the chaos and colour of the roadside informal trade. It’s also the epicentre of the cement industry in this part of the DRC, with all of the plants within a few kilometres of each other, located on huge limestone reserves.

because they have no education of use to a modern industrial plant.

The grandly-named Hotel Espace Nzilco was our place for the evening, and it looked as inviting as Mo had described it as. We checked in, Mo slipping the receptionist a little something extra with a none too subtle wink and grin, and went to unpack. Basically, the rooms are bungalows and resembled old military quarters from Belgian days, which a number of places I’ve stayed in in the DRC were. No Wi-Fi, so the bar and dinner it would be. Mo was already in full flight buying beer and whisky and chatting to whoever was in the bar. “My expensive friend!” he shouted as I walked in, telling the story in French to those listening and laughing. “Come! Drink shit whisky from you British and good beer from us Congolese!” Right on both counts. I chatted to a couple of Pakistani guys I’d worked with a couple of years before on a project not too far away. They drank like fish in the solid knowledge that what the imam couldn’t see, he couldn’t tell Allah (their words, more or less, not mine). Mo’s roving eye after a very good dinner of peri-peri chicken, freshwater fish and vegetables was my cue to grab a couple of bottles of beer and head to bed.

The next morning, we drove back to Lufu to inspect the border and try to understand the volumes of product crossing it, but we couldn’t get too close to the police or customs officials on account of my dodgy passport. We did some sums in the drizzle, and spoke to traders bemoaning the broken bridge, which would only take small vehicles as some of the supports had collapsed, meaning the cement and steel trucks had to offload onto small trucks and cars, get the goods over and then load up on trucks again on the other side. The Angolans, supplying most of the goods, wanted to fix it but the Congolese, trying to protect their dire, expensive and corrupt local industries were happy enough to leave it be to increase the costs of getting stuff to their side.

After a while watching, and trying to take pictures without getting seen (“No fuckin’ click-click – these cops’ fuckin crazy!”), we headed back out with a rough idea of what was going on. On the muddy, slippery road you have to drive slowly, but not everyone does. We saw a small truck lose control and careen down a small embankment, spilling all the fresh produce and breaking most of the beer it was transporting. The owner of the stock, a young lady, was sobbing. As much as the fright she got, that was her income gone for a few weeks, maybe more. Life on the margins is tough. It’s shit. Mo accelerated past the gathering crowd, all of whom were offering opinions as to whose fault the accident was.

doesn’t really give a sense of how slippery and potholed the road is – and unstable
on the sides, with bits caving in if large trucks get too close to the edges).
We got to the second town of Kongo Central Province, Mbanza Ngungu, and got stuck in the ubiquitous funeral procession, apparently for a well-known local musician. Mo wasn’t in the mood for dishing out cash, and kept his window closed. Apparently his wife was waiting for him. We got back to Kin without any further delays, and I’ve never been so happy to see a proper bed, hot running water, a restaurant and, most of all, familiarity.

A last day in Kin and I had an excellent meeting with a young guy from the investment promotion agency. Chatting through what I needed in terms of project information and our trip to Lufu, he smiled and said, “but we collect that trade data – even the informal trade, so we can know if our traders are being honest with volumes and prices”, and proceeded to e-mail the spreadsheets on the spot. What a win!
With a spring in my step, I went into my final meeting, with the national power company, looking for an outline of current and upcoming projects. The cantankerous bastard wouldn’t have been out of place in a recreation of Heart of Darkness and openly asked for money. Two faces of the Congo in one day, one old, one new; one condemning 80 million to poverty, the other swimming upstream to create a better life. All with the memory of the broken woman fresh in my mind.
It’s the Congo. It’s tough. It hurts you in ways you don’t expect; it thrills you in ways you can’t explain. It hardens you and teaches you humility and kindness all in one. It leaves you exhausted and angry; it creates a kaleidoscope of memories, vivid, jarring and spectacular. It never disappoints.

As told by serial luncher Deebee7.
Super Saturday, only 7 months late!

Ireland, England and France all still have a chance of winning the Six Nations.
In the unlikely event that Ireland beat France with a bonus point, they will win regardless of the other results. If they beat France, but without a bonus point, they still win if England fail to get a bonus point against Italy. If England win with a bonus point – as you’d expect them to – then it will come down to points difference, with Ireland currently being 23 points ahead.
If Ireland lose or draw, and England win, then England get the title, unless France win and have a better result than England’s victory in terms of championship points or, if on the same points, the points difference in scores. If they end up with the same points and points difference, then it comes down to tries scored, where France are currently ahead by 13-9.
Clear? Let’s play!
Onna telly this week
Friday 30th October
| Lions v Griquas | 16:55 | Sky Sports Mix |
Saturday 31st October
| Australia v New Zealand | 08:45 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Wales v Scotland | 14:15 | BBC1 / S4C |
| Pumas v Sharks | 14:25 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Italy v England | 16:45 | ITV / STV |
| Bulls v Stormers | 16:55 | Sky Sports Arena |
| France v Ireland | 20:05 | BBC1 / BBC2 |
Sunday 1st November
| Dragons v Munster | 14:00 | S4C / TG4 / Premier Sports 2 |
| Connacht v Treviso | 16:30 | TG4 / Premier Sports 2 |
| Italy v England (women) | 17:00 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Scarlets v Edinburgh | 18:45 | Premier Sports 1 |
Monday 2nd November
| Cardiff v Ulster | 18:00 | Premier Sports 2 |
| Zebre v Ospreys | 19:15 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Glasgow v Leinster | 20:15 | Premier Sports 1 |

Ha, Slade, couldn’t agree more. England look clueless. Non stop aimless kicking . May have to start supporting Italy in this game, they are showing all the endeavour to play.
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Ooh, that was exciting! What will the TMO show?
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Better fro OM Italy over the second half of that half. Not a truly wondrous England performance.
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Ah, just that it’s half-time.
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I get so annoyed watching a team full of entitlement play like this – it must come from Jones and he needs hoofing to the sun…………………………
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Oooh, shame . That would have been a deserved lead for Italy. Farrell annoying the ref, too. Need to make someone else captain.
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Left the match for 15 minutes to finish dinner and the Bulls have er, stormed through the Stormers! 25-6 having been 6-3 down after 15 minutes.
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At least Wales and Scotland had the excuse that they were playing in a hurricane*. What’s England’s excuse?
*OK, not quite.
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Don’t know what the idiots are thinking, they need at least 23 points to catch up to Ireland , and they kick for territory. Constantly. Surely Furbank has been pick because he can run, and he has Watson and May to play with.
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Sir Clive with me and Slade.
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Morne Steyn with a chip, chase, gather and offload to put the big Bulls lock in under the posts. I’m sure FD would agree that he’s by some distance the world’s premier 10.
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Strange tactics from England. All they have to do is keep the ball in hand, so naive are the Italians in defence. Nothings as awful as a team that blindly keeps applying a tactic that doesn’t work.
Exeter would’ve already dispatched Italy.
Still, England should easily get their BP.
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32-6 to the Bulls, still in the 1st half.
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There’s much hilarity on the coronavirus live blog, courtesy of a shambles of a government: https://www.theguardian.com/world/live/2020/oct/31/uk-coronavirus-boris-johnson-to-give-press-conference-on-new-lockdown-live-news
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Not watching Italy. Not watching the Bulls. But at least one game’s going my way today.
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Bohemians winning?
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Déjà vu all over again….
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2nd try for Youngs.
Pretty sure Eddie reads the blog. We should be England coaches.
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Italy making Ben Youngs look good at the moment. Took the try well though.
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Ben Youngs! Peerless! Got another 50 caps in him at least.
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Palazzani (?) has overdone his Hallowe’en costume.
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4 on 1 and Farrell kicks again.
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Italy being inspired by the Bushmills adverts pitchside.
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Not Palazzani, then, but whoever he replaced.
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England backs kicking every ball.
Down with Eddie!
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Up with Eddie!
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I wish the BP in the 6N followed the same rule as in T14: teams need a 4 tries difference, not just to score 4 tries. Makes it fairer and more interesting.
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BOLLOCKS!!
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Bloody Slade! (Sorry, Slade.)
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Match at Loftus suspended due to lightning. Bulls are 39-6 up, with Morne Steyn having a twilight career blinder.
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England are winning this pretty comfortably. England were expected to win this pretty comfortably. So why am I underwhelmed by this England performance? It’s almost as though they’ve done ‘just’ enough to win.
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Think that was the first pass May has received.
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Well. Come on Ireland! (Sorry, Flair.)
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Anyone know what the try diff is between England and Ireland?
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England were rubbish, tbh, BB No urgency, no fluency, too much kicking . Nothing creative at all in the backs the whole game. Very disappointing.To make matters worse, I shouted at Farrell for kicking with a mouthful of donut, and have got crumbs gumming up my keyboard.
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So now France need to get a BP and to win by 31 points to win the 6N. Doubtful.
Ireland do not need a BP, do they? Just a win by more than 8 points? Doable.
At least there is something at stake.
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I also think that Englands breakdown support play is crap, very slow untidy ball most of the time, Italy did well to make a mess of it, but they need to do better.
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I’m not happy with that. Kick and chase by the 3rd XV.
A complete waste of talent and playing time.
If you are good rugby players – play rugby. If not, don’t claim to be what you are not.
AND don’t play Slade at 12 – it’s a waste and you’ll break him.
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Allez les Bleus! ( sorry Thaum)
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Allez rugby – and may the best team win!
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Flair – 7 points or more is needed.
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France is a wonderful country full of sophisticated, intelligent and good-looking people. I think that, as the chances of them winning are extremely small, they should assist Ireland to beat England.
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Thaum – you’ve lost me……………………………..
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Slade – a fumbled pass here, a flubbed kick there, missed tackles everywhere … and voilà, Ireland winning by7 or more!
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Yosoy – must be loving these graphs.
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On the presser, Craigs?
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Someone explain triage to him.
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Thaum – trying to see if he’s lurking. Watching spaffers speech.
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Yes, yes, that’s what I meant. Stupid to leave education open. Good to extend furlough scheme.
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Will he finish before Strictly Come Dancing starts?
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