Everything will be all right tonight. Everything will be all right tonight. Or so I keep telling myself, as Ulster prepare to turn and face the strain of Leinster at the RDS. Let’s hope that Ulster can put Big Brother under pressure. It’s simple, really: all we have to do is win. But hope, boys, is a cheap thing, cheap thing: we are the dead.
While Ulster have lost Stockdale to injury, one South Effrican is back for us.
But one of Them has apparently recovered from yet another head injury.
Give me steel, give me steel, give me pulsars unreal
In other news – newsman wept (with joy) as he told me – a familiar face is returning to Cardiff.
Someone’s back in town the chips are down
I just cut and blackout
I’m under Mulvihill’s influence and my honour’s at stake
Today is David Bowie’s birthday, in case anyone was wondering.
Onna telly this week
Friday 8th January
| Glasgow v Edinburgh | 19:35 | Premier Sports 2 |
| Leinster v Ulster | 19:35 | TG4 / Premier Sports 1 |
| Bath v Wasps | 19:45 | BT Sport 2 |
| Sale v Worcester | 20:00 | BT Sport Extra |
Saturday 9th January
| Zebre v Treviso | 13:00 | Premier Sports 2 |
| Newcastle v Gloucester | 14:00 | BT Sport 2 |
| Griquas v Cheetahs | 14:30 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Exeter v Bristol | 16:30 | BT Sport 2 |
| Western Province v Sharks | 17:00 | Sky Sports Arena |
| Dragons v Ospreys | 17:15 | S4C / Premier Sports 1 |
| Cardiff v Scarlets | 19:35 | S4C / Premier Sports 1 |
| Connacht v Munster | 19:35 | TG4 / Premier Sports 2 |
Sunday 10th January
| Harlequins v London Irish | 15:00 | BT Sport 1 |
Saturday 16th January
| Glasgow v Edinburgh | 17:15 | Premier Sports 1 |
Ovally Balls 
Unless it gives you sneezes
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I’m sure the pig that provided my lunchtime ham was delighted to make the sacrifice.
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No relation of JM I suppose….
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People seem to be happy to sacrifice animals and animal products but not pray. That’s going in the notebook.
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Would praying help the animals?
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Or make them tastier
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I thought religious mumbo-jumboists always made the sign of a cross or some other appropriate symbol depending on their ‘faith’ before they stuck he knife in for ‘christian’ halal or other purposes………
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The only killing procedure that delivers the best flavour and texture is speed, discretion and minimum stress.
That’s why meat markets at railheads and industrialised abbatoirs are so awful – far too much stress in an alien environment for the beasts.
Mobile abbatoirs should be re-introduced – when our neighbours kill their beasts for food (lambs. pigs, sheep etc) they do it as quickly and cleanly as possible – it’s in their own interests.
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Slade – halal meat means stabbed in a jugular or windpipe and drained of blood whilst a prayer is said.
All or the above then.
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Apparently the animals must also have been raised on a vegetarian diet and can’t have antibiotics or hormones. Killing must also be by hand.
Interestingly only wild fish are allowed to ensure that they haven’t eaten animal by products but this includes sharks.
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Hard to believe that the overwhelming majority of western world food animals don’t receive antibiotics……………
Certainly it’s the law in France that all farm animals are a) tagged and b) jabbed according to the laws. Presumably that’s EU law (post-Brexit UK law is bound to be superior).
All the quadriped animals raised in ones and twos round here for local consumption are tagged and jabbed.
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Vegetarian is natural for cows, goats and sheep – perhaps even llamas.
Pigs will eat anything which is presumably why they are not kosher etc………………….
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Oi. Don’t bring me into this
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mmm………….yummy
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That doesn’t help my stress levels.
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If craigs starts praying near me I’m outta here.
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Imagine thousands of Mantids scuttling towards you………………
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IIRC Leviticus says they have cloven hoofs but don’t chew the cud – so they’re out
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cloven hooves covers cattle, sheep deer, pigs, antelopes, gazelles and, no doubt, LLAMAS
it’s the cud bit that’s the clncher……………………
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Chimpie – I’ll pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster for your stress levels to be reduced.
Ramen.
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Do we need to murder Chimpie to find out how many stomachs he’s got?
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24/7 observation may reveal whether he/she is a cud-chewer = 2 stomachs, I think.
He/she will not be allowed to sleep or eat fresh food during the study period – a fair requirement of science
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I like to think of Chimpie as a ruminant
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My household consumed some top quality bacon this morning.
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Can we make Haggis out of Chimpie?
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That would be offal for him.
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whose stomach would you cook him in?
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He’s got two.
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He might have two. We need to find out.
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this topic is being regurgitated – starve him, I say!
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hang on, think we need to be focusing on how best to cook BB
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You’re already in the frame for my murder and now you want to cook me! Outrageous!
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First brought it up a couple of days ago. Not like it’s new
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I’m up furra double murder tbh.
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Trump’s gone – but there is always a price to pay……………….
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Right! A fairly ghoulish evening in the dinghy. Hope you all made it through the night, limbs and stomachs intact.
England started well on the first morning of the Moose Clothing Cup powered by Daraz series, taking 2/7, but Thirimane and Mathews are fighting back – currently 66/2. I guess the Lankans decided that since they’ve got the longest names in cricket, they may as well have the longest series name too.
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Not as sophisticated – or controversial – as cheese ON toast, but this lot reckon their toastie is the GOAT. Discuss.
https://www.epicurious.com/recipes-menus/bombay-toastie-bombay-sandwich-article?utm_term=firstarticle
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76/2 at lunch. Jimmy with both scalps on his return, one a gimme by a batsman playing a T20 shot (that would have got him out too), the other a lovely ball by Jimmy inducing an inside edge on the the stumps. I’m assuming they’re rotating Broad and Anderson, keeping them fresh for India? Or have we reached the stage where England only have room for one of the old warhorses? Certainly they’ve got plenty of options in the bowling department these days.
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78/3 – another beautiful delivery from Anderson, round the wicket, slanting in and holds it’s line to induce the finest of edges. In his pomp, he’s a glorious sight to see.
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Jimmy has figures of 9 overs, 3 wickets, 6 runs – all whilst barely breaking 130km/h on average. His line, length and control are just immaculate.
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Oh – Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy……………..
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Not sure about moose clothing or goat toasties, but at least it’s sticking with the ruminants. Of more concern is the 16kg chicken from one of The Middle One’s maths questions.
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England may have plenty of bowling options, but most of them aren’t that good even if it is hard to choose between them.
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Deebs – that toasties needs more protein to go anywhere near the goat list.
I mean, diy bacon or smoked brisket is a minimum here.
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Your first choice attack, assuming all fit and firing? I’m assuming Archer would back, as would Stokes and possibly Moeen Ali? You’ve then got Broad, Anderson, Wood, Curren to choose two from (or even one) with Bess or Leach as the other spinning option. Archer, Anderson, Stokes, Broad, Ali/Bess? Sounds ok to me!
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Deebee, thanks for the cricket updates. I’ve noticed your football updates are becoming less frequent. I almost always enjoyed them. Please bring them back.
PS Might be out tomorrow so hard luck on the Lions’ loss. It was a valiant effort by your lot.
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Craigs, it needs at least that! Brisket, mmmm!
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Football updates have never been particularly frequent, but there isn’t much to update on, other than “oh look! Another 1-0 loss whilst having 125% of the possession!”
Send me your number and I’ll keep you updated on the rugby – poor old Morne’s 100th match for the Bulls will memorable for all the wrong reasons.
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Although, CMW, take Anderson’s figures out of today’s match so far and you’ve got 46 overs, none for 151!
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@Deebee – Do you think they’ll do well in India with those spinners? Or on good batting tracks in Australia? I hope to be pleasantly surprised, but am expecting some thumpings. Once Anderson and Broad go I’m not even that convinced about them at home – Woakes is probably next best for English conditions (you missed him out), but will be 32 by this summer and really has missed out on what could have been a very good test career due to the others going on so long. Curran and Stokes are fourth seamers, Wood is often injured and sometimes totally ineffective anyway though can be very good. Root doesn’t seem to be sure how he wants to use Archer though his role may change again when Anderson/Broad go anyway.
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