I’ll try to keep this as short as possible.
Three games this week-end; that is, if France once again do not shrug their way out of the most porous bubble (called a sieve here, see below) ever seen since John Boyd Dunlop invented the flat tire.
The teams:
England: At the moment they look like a good example of someone’s definition of madness: do the same thing over and over and expect a different result.
Wales: Don’t call them fortunate; they hate it. Napoléon would have a word with Pivac though. A disastrous autumn followed by a welcome revival. Tedious at times, lethal sometimes. Will finish first unless France get a GS.
France: Will achieve a GS (see Wales).
Ireland: Stale but still mid-table. Reaching their tipping point on the declankidney-o-meter. That green jersey looks more and more like a corset, including to the meanies usually in blue.
Scotland: The perennial underachiever. Couldn’t even beat covided France by forfeit. Lovely to watch though. Definitely the colour of a dark horse.
Italy: they prove that the old adage “it’s easier to organise defence than attack” is plain rubbish. They produced lovely moves but they could not catch a slug on a Zimmer frame.
The games:
Italy vs Wales: makes me sad that a 6 Nations game is a foregone conclusion. Italy have unearthed some exciting new players but they lost what was their main strength, a solid if unimaginative pack. Their scrum is so wobbly they could hire Australians to improve them, the line-out is a mess and their defensive line look from above like a child’s drawing of a bolt of lightning. The only uncertainty is whether Wales will get the bonus point before or after the oranges. As for Wales, it’s a bit strange not to experiment a bit more, most of the team being a known quantity. Pivac probably wants battle hardened warriors for next week’s game, but it looks like a missed opportunity to blood new players. I’ll watch it, if only for AWJ and of course for Liam Williams: he may look like a horse rider but he’s a superb full back.
England vs France: both teams pick themselves but for different reasons. Eddie is so conservative he’d make Maggie look like a socialist. Apart from the obvious, he seems quite reluctant to change a formula that has shown its limitations. Scotland, who play a similar game to France, cruelly exposed them. And so did Wales in a different style. In both games England seemed incapable of changing gear and controlling their discipline. Of course, they’ll be more fit and the inclusion of Malins will bring more threat but Daly is still on the bench. Funny how a vibrant club game does not translate into a more fluid national squad.
France easily beat England in Paris last year and came close to winning the AI cup with a B team. It certainly helps in terms of confidence, but this is different. They might be as rusty as England, after the covid bubble burst. They also have the same problem as England in terms of discipline and the team that will remain on Andrew Brace’s side will take a big step ahead. But France have been rebuilding seriously for the past two years, they have a young but settled team, they know what to do and they’ll trust their ability to do it. A curiosity: France’s bench will be 6/2 whereas England’s will be 5/3.
I can see only one outcome. If the packs cancel one another, which I expect, then France have more threat in the backs. France by one score. With a bonus point, like Wales? Nah. A win would be good enough.
Scotland/Ireland: this should be a cracking game and it’s a hard one to call. Both teams lost to Wales, with one man down, but in different fashion. Both could’ve won (fine margins etc.) but I thought Scotland were the most enterprising of the three.
Ireland play a well-rehearsed game, easy to read, hard to stop. Sexton is a fading force but the way they play, he can still do the job for a couple of years. What’s that I hear? Deep sighs from the notablog showrunner? And where is Cooney, anyway?
I expect a lot of box-kicking, some good chases, some not so good and then beware Hogg and friends.
Just like France, Scotland might be a bit rusty for missing a game but I heard they played within their clubs. They should play a looser game than Ireland, with more unpredictability. Finn had a mediocre game last week with Racing. Was he keeping his powder dry? It does not really matter because Scotland have proven last year they can play without Finn, and well.
My money would be on a Scotland win but not by much.
I hope you all enjoy the week-end of rugby and I hope the refs will not be at centre stage like two weeks ago.
Oh, and before I go, a little recipe. No need for a sieve, but keep one handy, just in case you need to escape from Marcatraz (that’s what the French players nicknamed their rugby camp in Marcoussis, south of Paris).
The most famous omelette in France is served by La Mère Poulard restaurant (overrated and overpriced) in the Mont Saint Michel. It may not be the best omelette but it’s quite striking.
You’ll need 10 eggs.
2 table spoons of crème fraîche
40 g of butter
Salt, pepper
It will serve 4 people or a prop.
Save two eggs for the end.
Separate the yolks from the white. Whip the yolks lightly, but the whites ferociously with the salt. If by hand, at least several minutes, so they become almost solid.
Melt butter in a hot pan, add the yolks. When they begin to stick to the pan, add crème fraîche and the whipped whites. Do not stir. Make sure it does not stick too hard on the bottom. When ready, fold the omelet in two, so it looks like this:
Spray freshly ground pepper on top and serve immediately. Some in an upside down universe recommend Latour ‘82 with it, but it’s bollocks. I have yet to find a wine that goes well with eggs. Cider will be fine.
While you enjoy your first fluffed omelette, take the remaining eggs and throw them at my face when – if, he says tentatively? – my predictions, as usual, do not come true. As I said, I tried to keep this as short as possible.
As foretold by Flair99
Onna telly this week
Friday 12th March
| Zebre v Leinster | 17:45 | Premier Sports 2 |
| Bristol v Wasps | 19:45 | BT Sport 1 |
| Munster v Scarlets | 20:00 | S4C / Premier Sports 2 |
| Glasgow v Ospreys | 20:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
Saturday 13th March
| Newcastle v Bath | 12:30 | BT Sport Extra |
| Exeter v Harlequins | 12:30 | BT Sport Extra |
| Italy v Wales | 14:15 | ITV / S4C |
| Northampton v Sale | 14:45 | BT Sport Extra |
| Gloucester v Leicester | 15:00 | BT Sport Extra |
| England v France | 16:45 | ITV |
| Dragons v Ulster | 19:35 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Connacht v Edinburgh | 19:35 | Premier Sports 2 |
Sunday 14th March
| Treviso v Cardiff Not-Blues | 13:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| London Irish v Worcester | 13:00 | BT Sport 1 |
| Scotland v Ireland | 15:00 | BBC1 |
Ovally Balls 
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Exeter score a try. The PA blasts out some Hollywood-style music that you’d associate with the shot when the Native Americans appear on the ridge under which the white heroes are riding to symbolise that the European Champions are called the Chiefs because for non cultural appropriation reasons.
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I know Nige can be a bit of a cliche, but this is interesting as a football refs reaction to him:
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‘Norngibbon?
Is that NI pronunciation?
No, that’s just CMW being bloody rude.’
I know, shocking. The full title is thieving norngibbon.
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Good levitation skillz by that winger
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@Tomp – not just the finish, but the pass to the player that makes the try – woof!
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McKenzie did everything he could to stop that try, it was brilliant defence, but that was some finish, terrific.
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SBT, Marcus Smith is my favourite current rugby player, it’s just bizarre that he isn’t getting a look in from Eddie
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Strange choice by Care to go for a drop goal there.
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Quins leading 10-7 at oranges. Exeter should really be up. Quins layers looking quite tired at ht.
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I had forgotten I could get BT Sport Extra
Cool
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Shame about that wee knock on there, it was a lovely try otherwise
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Every team needs a Will Evans. Great Jackle
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Exeter looking quite off-colour; Quins co-ordinating well
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Typical bit of open play by Chiefs gives them their second. Rather impressed with much of the Quins defence so far. Last quarter is always harsh in Sandy Park
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Playing in a West Country bog is not helping the skills on either team but I agree that Chiefs are not looking as efficient as last week. Just as well for the galant Quins
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phew!
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So close Quins. That Dave Evers was an absolute nuisance in the last quarter. Congrats Chiefs on finally stringing some effective play at the end
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Bit of LRZ magic there.
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We’re playing well but Italy are totally hapless.
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Big result that, from 7-20 down.
A win whilst playing below par. Once again grinding the opposition down after a lot of hard work for not much reward in the first half.
Mind you, credit to Quins, they are much improved and playing consistently well.
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Mike Brown really good again.
If Marcus Smith aims to be top dog he should be bossing the game at 20-7 up but somehow, he doesn’t and Care seems to call the shots. Odd that.
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Knock-on? That wasn’t a knock-on.
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Not so much Forza Italia as oohya Italy
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Couldn’t quite put my finger on how Qs lost their momentum into the last quarter, perhaps they lost some direction or Chiefs were better at bringing their bullying game to the fore.
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Biggar tackling like Faz there.
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I’m pretty sure it was another Italian player – the one who landed on top of him – who banged heads.
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@Mr Cod
Exeter seem to make opponents work very hard in the first quarter, trusting in their own fitness and skills to power through in the last 15 minutes.
As I implied above, when Quins needed Smith to boss the game, he had ‘disappeared’.
Sam Simmonds was quiet today – well policed by Quins.
If Exeter had made fewer unforced handling errors (mainly Cuthbert and Cordero) I don’t think things would have been as close.
Quins Marler, back row forwards + Care kept them in it .
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Embarrasingly close in Rome.
Just kidding.
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I think I’ll give the second half a miss, the only question left in this game is if Wales can bring up the 50, and I think they can
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Six of Sale’s forwards are Saffers…………..
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Am watching now Bayonne vs Agen, the two teams at the bottom of the top14.
Not blaming Wales of course, but its more interesting in Bayonne than in Rome.
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Borg back on track – hammering Jersey………….
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Great score by Ioane.
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Hmm. Could easily have been a red, that
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Josh Adam’s is having a harrowing 2nd half.
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Josh Adam’s Josh Adams.
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LRZ intercepts and that’s that.
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Let’s hope the next match is a bit more exciting. Although it is a joy to watch LRZ.
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All a bit dispiriting for Italy
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Pfft, didn’t even make 50.
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Iain McKinlay compares England to Italy.
ROG goes for England to win. Good man of Cork.
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Bit of a shame that Wales blew what would have been two of their best tries. All a bit of a formality after a very poor start from Italy.
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Allez les bleus!
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Thanks for the ATL, Flair! Bonne etouffe, as you don’t say…. Will read back BTL later.
Italy v Wales a bit predictable but Wales did what they had to do and did it well.
England will be awful.
I think that just about covers it… see you when the debacle is over.
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Good words flair.
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Jones out
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Jebus
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Ouf! That was quick!
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