You wait bloody ages for an ATL, and then two turn up at once….
No prizes for guessing which is the work of Craigsman, and which of Deebee7.
The Glorious Series Continues
Pre/Ramble
So it’s a bit weird that, with a Lionz series in south Africa being poised with one game each, rugby fans seems quite deflated about the last match in this series. No fans, empty stadiums, accusations of biting, of slowing down the game, of racism, of influencing the referee have all played a part. But really it’s the fact that the rugby hasn’t set the world alight that’s the problem (Springbok tries aside) in this Craigsman’s opinion. Both sides seem to be playing low risk stuff seeing who breaks first. Kick, kick, kick. The Kiwis would lap this up. Form-wise, apart from the last half of the second game (and a bit in the first half of the first game) the Lions forwards have been able to get the dominance needed to win but they have been blunt in attack. Here’s hoping that rugby* wins and we get a game on Saturday. Let’s have a look at the teams innit.
LionzTM
So this makes me wonder what the feck Gats is playing at with his selection for the third test. I am but a simple accountant, unused to the complexities of rugby coaching, but I’m trying to work out some of the choices made at 9 and 10 and 21 and 22. Starting with a live wire scrum half and a … solid fly half and then ending with a … solid scrum half and a live wire fly half seems to be negating the strengths of each player. Either start with the live wire options and when the Springbok defence proves too miserly to score tries against or a nice healthy lead has been built, end with the … wise old heads who like to kick and do the game management stuff. Or, do the opposite to chase the game. What do I know? Everything else in the team seems reasonable. Courtney Lawes has done well to ignore the instructions from Dan Biggar and the rest of the pack looks solid. I would probably have Tadhg MK II in the finishers but hey ho. The back 3 look like they could negate a dastardly kicking game and we have two lumps in the centre to negate the Boks and the “amazing” Elliot Daly to come in against the tired legs at the end. So, I’m sanguine there.
Springboks
The Springboks look rubbish and will get hammered whatever happens look like a settled unit right now with the only changes have come from injury and OH MY GOD IT’S MORNE FECKING STEYNE!!!!!!!!!! Maybe it’s just more trolling from Rassie and we’ll see a last minute ‘injury’ and a proper player like Wynand Olivier will replace him. Just ignorant speculation on my part. Other than that, I can’t see anything to pick at. It’s a formidable side and Lionz supporters everywhere will have breathed a sigh of relief that Duane Vermeulen hasn’t yet come back from injury. I think they will rinse and repeat what worked in the second game. And why not? I hope that their fantastic wingers see some more ball in this game though. If only for them to be bundled into touch at the last second.
Prediction
Whoever gets the forward grunt and manages the ref will win. I really hope it doesn’t come down to the ref or some bs unseen citing or time wasting or whatever. Hopefully the ref will keep the game flowing and we’ll have a classic* on our hands. So who do I think will win?
Erm… hopefully Gats will put me in my place and Finn will catch a perfect box kick to sling an amazing pass to Sam Simmonds for his record breaking hat trick and the Lions win by a point or more.
Or… the Springboks grind the plucky tourists into the dirt and they will win by 18 points. Morne Steyne kicking the final penalty from the Springboks 22.
Or… the test never bloody ends.
Ok, ok Lions 24** – 21 Springboks. There, come at me you bastards.
Final ‘thoughts’
The real question on everyone’s lips is ‘what will this mean for England’? I’ll be btl to give my thoughts on this shortly.
* Which means the Lions win. Anything else is one for the purists.
** Have I mentioned that Siya Kolisi has a special place in my heart? I’ll have another poster to put on my bedroom wall after this series so all is not lost if the Lionz lose.
My Way, Or How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love the Bomb Squad
Gats and Rassie loom into view through the smoke-filled karaoke bar, each picking up a mike and ignoring the other, before launching into their tuneless non mea culpa est:
And now, the end is near, and so I face the final curtain
My friends, we’ll kick it clear, we’ll force the pace of which we’re certain
We’ve kicked a ball out full, we’ve launched the oval skyway
But more, much more than this, we did it our way
Attacks, we’ve had a few, but then again, too few to mention
We kicked what we had to kick, and soar it through without invention
I planned each scrumming force, each sideways step and passes astray
But more, much more than this, the blame is his way
The lights dim, the mikes clatter emptily to the floor, clunking soullessly as they slink to the exits, grim, with regret etched on their faces. But enough of my whisky and chocolate addled dreams last night.
The third Test. The series is alive, if not exactly kicking, if you ask many followers. The changes have been wrung, the die is cast and now we’re 80 minutes (or up to 120 depending on how things pan out) from anointing the victors with bragging rights for the next 12 years. Enough has been written about the quality (or absence thereof) of the first two Tests and the series in general, much of it accurate, much of it bilge, so let’s focus on the match to come, shall we?
Six changes in the Lions camp and 3 (one positional) in the Boks. The Lions have been roaring all week about speeding up the game, gaining tempo, running the Boks ragged and raiding the trophy cabinet in the process. In come Price at 9 to speed up delivery from the base – but to Biggar at 10 who hasn’t set the world light in ether teste thus far. Outside him, Bundee Aki, a poor man’s Damian de Allende, comes in to allow Henshaw to move to 13 in an attempt to create more space in midfield, whilst at the back, the Welsh duo of Williams for Hogg and Adams for Watson on the right wing aims to get more incisiveness in attack. On the bench, Connor Murray and Finn Russell are paired, a conservative slower 9 with a heads-up 10, seems strange, to say the least and suggests that Gatland remains conservative and not trusting of an all-out assault on the Bok defence.
Up front the Welsh duo of Jones and Owens are slotted into a front row that struggled last week, despite the Lions leading at oranges, the second and back row is unchanged, slightly surprising given the backseat they took and enormous energy expended seven days ago. AWJ, warrior that he is, must be feeling the effects, whilst Lawes was fairly anonymous last week.
The bench looks strong, but not overly stellar and there must be some concerns in the Lions camp that six new players who’ve spend much of the last month carrying tackle bags will be disruptive – if it is early one, the Lions will be playing catch up.
The Boks have two enforced injury changes, with talismanic 9 Faf de Klerk and indispensable blindside PS du Toit both out. These are huge blows, however much Bok fans will try to sugar-coat things. De Klerk is without peer at the box kicking game and all-round nuisance value, whilst du Toit is an 80 minute machine across the park. It’s resulted in considerable rejigging in the Bok side, with Lood de Jager back in the second row to partner Eben Etzebeth and Franco Mostert moving to blindside in du Toit’s place. Big moves. De Jager back is great news, adding considerably to the scrumming department and lineout, as well as carrying in heavy traffic, but is more limited out wide. Mostert has played flank, but with limited success. That said, du Toit only played 20 minutes last week, half of them knackered, and the Boks coped just fine without him. The rest of the pack is as is for the starters, and that’s good news.
The bench forwards are the same front row, which is formidable and duffed their opponents last week, whilst Mostert will slot back into the second row later on, with Kwagga – far better on the flank replacing du Toit than playing at 8 as in the first Test – and Marco van Staden coming on later to pinch ball, slow things down and add some vim to the forwards.
The backs have Cobus Reinach at 9, a different player to Faf, without the pinpoint kick accuracy, but absolutely electric around the fringes and in open play. If he brings his ‘A’ game (assuming he’s given licence) he presents an entirely different headache for the Lions – and possibly his own side. The rest of the backs are the same as the first two Tests and pick themselves. Perhaps Reinach can offer some space for Kolbe and Mapimpi to snipe down the blindside every now and then? However, an inaccurate display by Reinach could set the tone for the Lions to dictate the pace and shape of the match. It’s a critical piece of the jigsaw.
Key areas to watch, then, are:
- Whether the Lions can maintain parity up front for the full 80 (or near enough) to dictate what happens behind the scrum;
- Will six new players be too disruptive to the Lions, despite much of it revolving around national combinations – some of the guys are pretty rusty;
- How Gats introduces his bench – do Murray and Russell join the fray together, and if so, what’s the point?
- Will the Boks be able put down a marker from the get-go and dominate the Lions up front to dictate the pace (and crucially the scoreboard) to negate the threats out wide;
- Will Faf’s absence prove too disruptive to a Bok plan that has been well honed for a couple of years now and will allow the Lions to move the ball wide to their very good back three;
- Will the Boks surprise and give it a bit of width themselves earlier in the piece; they’re certainly more than capable of scoring tries whilst maintaining a mean defence;
- Will the refereeing quartet come out unscathed? In many respects, I think the last point is maybe the most important.
Prediction? I’ve gone Boks by 2 on Superbru, which portends, unfortunately, a Lions win based on the last two matches…
South Africa
15 Willie le Roux, 14 Cheslin Kolbe, 13 Lukhanyo Am, 12 Damian de Allende, 11 Makazole Mapimpi, 10 Handre Pollard, 9 Cobus Reinach, 8 Jasper Wiese, 7 Franco Mostert, 6 Siya Kolisi (captain), 5 Lood de Jager, 4 Eben Etzebeth, 3 Frans Malherbe, 2 Bongi Mbonambi, 1 Steven Kitshoff
Substitutes: 16 Malcolm Marx, 17 Trevor Nyakane, 18 Vincent Koch, 19 Marco van Staden, 20 Kwagga Smith, 21 Herschel Jantjies, 22 Morne Steyn, 23 Damian Willemse
British & Irish Lions
15 Liam Williams (Wales), 14 Josh Adams (Wales), 13 Robbie Henshaw (Ireland), 12 Bundee Aki (Ireland), 11 Duhan van der Merwe (Scotland), 10 Dan Biggar (Wales), 9 Ali Price (Scotland), 8 Jack Conan (Ireland), 7 Tom Curry (England), 6 Courtney Lawes (England), 5 Alun Wyn Jones (captain, Wales), 4 Maro Itoje (England), 3 Tadhg Furlong (Ireland), 2 Ken Owens (Wales), 1 Wyn Jones (Wales) Substitutes: 16. Luke Cowan-Dickie (England), 17 Mako Vunipola (Saracens, England), 18 Kyle Sinckler (England), 19 Adam Beard (Wales), 20 Sam Simmonds (England), 21 Conor Murray (Ireland), 22 Finn Russell (Scotland), 23 Elliot Daly (England)
Ovally Balls 
Arsenal looking like they’ll really be in the mix in the Championship next season.
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‘Arsenal’ must surely be the collective noun for arseholes.
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“the likes of Cuthbert, Francis and Baldwin returning to Wales”
Whatever Francis is doing it isn’t returning to Wales.
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Happy Ianto + Matthew Screech to Cardiff = Sad Mr Iks.
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Took a bit of doing, but Arsenal were up to the challenge of getting below Norwich in the table.
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They play each other next game in a relegation 6 pointer! In September!
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Happy Ianto is still all class, CMW. Long way to go yet for him, and I look forward to seeing more.
On another, more bitter note, are you proud of yourself, Tony Blair ? How does your legacy look today, you self interested prick?
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@SBT – I’m not proud of myself, but I’m not Tony Blair.
Everyone knows Happy Ianto should be at the Dragons. That said he’ll probably still end up there once he’s no longer “all class”.
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I pick my opponents more wisely than TB. Today it’s the Cambridge Methodists XI. Then again they can’t really be trusted as they’re not from Cambridge and I strongly suspect some of them of not being Methodists. They may of course be devotees of the Cambridge method.
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https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2021/aug/29/merry-michael-gove-seen-dancing-alone-in-aberdeen-nightclub
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rumour that I hear is that, allegedly, he is closet gay – and this could be the beginning of the wheels coming off.
If any of that is true, it’s not a thing I would wish for any human being.
society sucks…………………
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If forced to guess, I would think he was gay. Not least because he dances a lot better than I thought he would!
But that’s completely irrelevant to his complete and utter twattishness.
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Methodism has either got rather bigger than I realised in the British Pakistani and Afghan communities or my suspicions were correct.
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Lee Scratch Perry RIP.
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Happy Bank Holiday to all!
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@Thaum – If *I* were forced to guess, I’d say he was high off his tits.
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Refit, doesn’t he have prior for, um, snow boarding?
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Deebee, I couldn’t possibly comment.
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Thanks Deebee – but not here in Ireland.
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Refit – oh yes, I thought that went without saying!
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Sorry Trisk, not here either!
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Kurt-Lee Arendse of the Bulls took an unusual route to a possible concussion on Saturday:
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Super Rugby Pacific is official, with the inclusion of two sides from the Pacific region and the dumping of SA, Argentina and Japan from the format:
https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/aug/30/super-rugby-pacific-set-for-2022-kick-off-in-game-changer-for-union
The SA sides (the big four unions, anyway) are sorted with ProWooInfinity deal, but what happens to club rugby now in Argentina and the Sunwolves in Japan? And SA’s other professional sides? The Lions finished bottom of the ladder behind the Griquas, Pumas and Cheetahs, so where does it leave those three sides? A tournament that includes them, some kind of rejigged Kings (with real adults in charge of the books), maybe sides from Namibia and Zimbabwe and a couple from Argentina? A Sunwolves selection? Problem with that is the travel bills are pretty big for smaller unions and may create more financial woes than they solve for the sake of a competition.
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The problem as well is that if you take a full blooded Jaguares side into the comp, they would murder everyone, without a doubt, so the Argentine union would need to possibly dilute that into two sides (not sure if they could field 3?) which may work if you have one in BA and one in Mendoza, which are both the focal points of regional tournaments in Argentina.
Both Namibia and Zimbabwe (as South West Africa and Rhodesia, respectively) played in the old Currie Cup back in the day and more recently have played in a tournament here as well that I can’t remember (along with an Argentine selection), so I suppose it may be possible if carefully done and well managed. Does kinda put even more pressure on the poor old Currie Cup though.
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Dean Richards says he was told by someone in the 2003 England world cup squad that fake blood was used to manage subs during the tournament.
He also said the practice was commonplace, as was the use of anaesthetics and cutting open old wounds.
Woodward says Richards is talking nonsense.
Oh well, it’s something to pass the time on social media until the new season starts.
Top 14 on Saturday as well as the RC, I felt bereft last weekend, though there was a cracker of a Super 6 match on Friday night with Watsonians beating Southern Knights 32 – 21.
I guy who was a couple of years below me at school has a son in the Watsons side, he won’t make the step up to Edinburgh or Glasgow, but he’s a good blindside at this level.
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Was that by England, ticht? My memory of that dreadful tournament isn’t that good but I’d like to see the receipts from Mr Richards. All he’s done is remind me that he got caught cheating dreadfully a few years later. And fair play to Woodward, if you’re going to cheat like that at least win.
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Yeah, it was by England apparently, but it’s hearsay as Richards says he was told by someone in the squad.
Elsewhere the Bok takeover of Scottish rugby continues with AB Zondagh joining the Scotland coaching team from Toulouse. His remit is to replace Mike Blair as attack specialist.
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His dad was coach at the Bulls for a while, and Western Province and Sarries.
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I think the 2003 result should be scrapped.
And fair play to
WoodwardRassie, if you’re going to cheat like that at least win.Haven’t heard this being expressed on here, or anywhere else in the NH media.
Ticht, I hope the Wobblies can put up a better show this time out and not fade so badly late on. They’ve looked good in parts and some parts have looked good, but can’t seem to put the good bits and good patches together for long enough to beat the evil ABs.
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Englishmen Luke Pearce and Matt Carley share the whistle duties for the 4 remaining Bok Tests in the RC. Pearce I know, but not Carley. What sort of ref is he?
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Better than any South African. Not as good as Nic Berry, but cut from the same cloth.
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One for you, Deebee:
https://www.thedeadballarea.com/south-africas-attack-are-they-better-than-we-think/
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TomP, faultless analysis, best so far this year. Slightly dodgy grammar and spelling, but who am I to complain? It’s an argument I’ve been making for years, although less succinctly. If you ask people about the Bok side that won in 2007 all they’ll talk about is no tries in the Final, not that the side scored 30+ points in every match leading up to it. Similarly, the four backline tries the Boks scored to the two maul tries of the Lions goes unremarked by those with blinkers, including Ian Foster.
I feel a weight has been lifted from my shoulders with this sage analysis.
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Who is the guy who wrote that?
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He’s a guy who’s done some coaching in Jordan and does online analysis. He lived in Pretoria – after our time there – while he worked for the UK High Commission but is back in the UK now I think.
He should have praised the Am play off the floor v England even more than he did.
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Here’s one of his old videos. Shows the lazy stuff about Gatland’s teams not being able to play etc etc for what it is:
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I’ve seen that guy before and I’m wary of him and the others like Squidge who write a narrative after a game that fits what they’ve seen.
It’s not that difficult and they’ve somehow become gurus.
Meh.
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Yes but he’s spot on about the Boks, Ticht. Glorious analysis.
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It’s former Drags Lege Cory Hill in that clip, not Jake Ball.
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It had passed me by that Cory Hill has moved to Japan. Fingers crossed for Big Benny Carter to prove the biz.
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A Glorious Spring Morning to all of you! Ah, the onset of spring and the gentle meandering towards summer, filled with deep blue skies, hot weather, chilled wine, the smell of braai smoke, the sounds of insects and birds in the garden, cold beer, long, lazy lunches, electric and thunderous late afternoon storms, and all of this before heading home from the office. Glorious!
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Afternoon MrIks, because you’re there I was looking through the Drags squad and I was surprised to read that Jamie Roberts is 34, he’s been around so long that I thought he was older.
Good luck for the coming season, I hope the competition isn’t affect by this damned covid.
Embra are at Dave Parade at the end of November.
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Deebs, our teams don’t meet until April, that just seems odd that two teams in the same competition won’t meet until 8 months after it starts.
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The Lions kick off their URC campaign with four away fixtures against Zebre (24 September), Scarlets (1 October), Glasgow Warriors (9 October) and Ulster (15 October).
Couldn’t ask for a gentler introduction to the comp than that! Delighted! Obviously we’ll lose all four, but by smaller margins than starting against Leinster or Munster. Looks like we’ll have to wait 8 months into the competition to get our first win against NH opposition too.
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“Looks like we’ll have to wait 8 months into the competition to get our first win against NH opposition too.”
touché
I don’t think we have any Lions in our team, the Boks are mostly ex-Cheetahs – De Bruin, Venter and Nel. Schoey was with the Bulls I think, is that correct?
I expect him to be capped in November and be away for the 6N period too
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Jaco vd Walt was a Lions player. He’s from Monnas in Krugersdorp and played at the University of Johannesburg – played outside half in the first game I went to in SA.
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ticht, de Bruin played in the same high school side as Pierre Schoeman.
He’s the first player seated on the left in the photo. Schoeman’s in the middle of the 3 in the 3rd row. Jannes Kirsten of Exeter and Nico Janse van Rensburg, a new Bok, are in the back row.
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“Jaco vd Walt was a Lions player”
So he was, my mistake.
I was thinking that he is one to keep an eye on this year and next, I get the feeling that there is a creative player in there desperate to get out and he was never allowed to do so under the old regime, but he did show the odd glimpse.
I’m looking forward to seeing how he does under Mike Blair, him and the two young fly halves.
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He always struck me as steady rather than too creative but he was behind Jantjies at the Lions and he’s a very creative guy. He got picked at full back a few times for them and that must have helped.
Green, the ex-Lions boy who plays for Harlequins, played a lot of outside half at school level.
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He’s no Finn Russell, but I’ve seen a few glimpses that make me think he could surprise a few people, perhaps not, but Mike Blair is a completely different kettle of ball games to Richard Cockerill
incidentally, this came up on Rugby Dump last week, I like rugby like this
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