Back to bad old days for the Springboks, being excluded from a tournament when we all know they’d have cakewalked it without raising a sweat. A bit like the World Cup and Lions tour. So easy was it that our Director of Rugby took to making videos to help the refs and carrying water onto the pitch for the boys to have a wee sip whilst the opposition lay scattered to the four corners. Anyway, not much we can do about this latest iniquity, so let’s have a look at the dross on display and see if we can squeeze a modicum of excitement out of the Six Nations: Greatest Show on Earth™.
France to Prance! Two silver medals (and nobody ripping them off their necks, I note) in the last two editions suggests that the combination of Galthié, Edwards and the growing presence of Dupont and Ntamack behind a typically rugged French pack should see them press for the whole thing this time around. France showed in taking a virtually third-string side to Australia in 2021 and then stuffing the All Blacks up their holes that they’re both good enough and have the depth to cope with the inevitable injuries and – dog forbid – Covid disruptions plaguing modern sport. France ease into the tournament with Italy at home, dusting off the cobwebs before playing possibly the defining match of the tournament a week later, at home to Ireland. Win those two and the French are fair set for another second-place finish behind the Boks.
Ireland are Firing! Probably the most consistent side of the last couple of years and with quality in most key positions, the Irish are many pundits’ favourites for the whole thing. Like France, they stuffed the Kiwis in the Autumn Internationals, to throw down a gauntlet to the rugby world this year. Ireland have quality across the park, with the one question being the increasingly age-old questions of whether the half back pair of Connor Murray and Johnny Sexton are up for another season. There’s plenty of depth behind those two, and with some scintillating outside backs emerging from the bogs, allied to one of the toughest, best loose trios out there, Ireland really could rip up a few trees this time out. Home to Wales first up, and a likely win (it’s been almost a decade since one of these sides won away), it’s then off to Paris for a potential Championship decider – should be a cracker. With a convenient breather after those two against Italy, it’s then away to an England who could be in disarray or eyeing a Grand Slam, before a potential last week banana skin against the ever-improving, continually disappointing Scots. Ireland to contest fiercely for that coveted second place behind the Boks.
Brave Scots or Bon Mots? Difficult to tell, really. With Finn Russell as skipper of the good ship Scotland you’re as likely to roar through the Strait of Messina giving two fingers to each of Scylla and Charybdis as you are wrecking yourself on the Thames tide. Scotland’s pack is now steady enough in the set piece (mostly) and has some fine, tearaway loose forwards in the best traditions of Scottish sides of yesteryear, to complement their back division. Get some decent front foot ball and this side can do serious damage. Eight B&I Lions last year, and only Ireland more consistent in the 6N in terms of wins in the last few years should see this Scots side bristling with confidence – and yet, is the self-belief there? They’ll not be lacking in motivation for the visit of England in round one, and a visit to Cardiff to face a potentially battered and bruised Wales could set them up for a glorious tilt at the whole shebang. They host favourites France after the break with the loser of that match surely consigned to the also-rans bin and can empty the tank on that one, with a break before travelling to Italy to come and then the other favourites, Ireland on the last weekend. If Scotland can navigate a way past the Scylla of France and Charybdis of Ireland, glory awaits! But it’s a long tournament and disruptions won’t be papered over easily with a callow pool to pick from. Out of the medals, with France and Ireland scrapping for the minor placings behind the mighty Boks.
Mojo or Bojo? Let’s face it, with Eddie ‘Rasputin was an amateur’ Jones calling the shots, you’re never really sure whether the chariot will swing, low, sweetly or at all. Plans have been disrupted by the loss of captain and talisman Owen Farrell, his replacement Courtney Lawes along with both first-choice wings and Manu ‘part-timer’ Tuilagi for the initial stages at least, means a disrupted backline held together by, er, Ben Youngs. On paper that looks horrible. Actually it looks horrible all round, but England beat both Australia and the Boks (how, nobody knows) in November so will have some cause for optimism. Young Marcus at 10 and Freddie Steward at 15 give England some fabulous attacking options though, behind a pack that whilst disrupted, seldom takes a backward step – and surely won’t do against Scotland first up. That said, it’s been lean pickings against the Scots in recent times, who have some class of their own. Away to Scotland is perilous against this backdrop of disruption, especially with a full Murrayfield and England will do well to host Italy with their personnel and faculties intact. Hosting Wales and Ireland before travelling to France is a bridge too far for this side. Perhaps Bojo the Slippery will come to the rescue by declaring war on France for not declaring war on Russia for not invading Ukraine? Either way, tussling with Scotland and Wales for the rights to look down on Italy.
Wales, beached or bubbling? Reigning Champions after a remarkable 2021 campaign, helped along nicely by the inability of opponents to keep all fifteen on the field for much of it, should see the Welsh with a decent shout this year. But the loss of AWJ, George North, Leigh Halfpenny, Ken Owens, Josh Navidi, Justin Tipuric and Taulupe Faletau is huge in terms of experience and ability. Dan Biggar gets his chance to wave his arms at the ref as actual skipper this year and has some great runners outside of him in LRZ, Josh Adams and Liam Williams and Lions nine Gareth Davies to steady things behind the scrum. The forwards will be well served by Lions loosehead Wyn Jones and tighthead Tomas Francis, but may be light between them, whilst the second row looks ‘orrible without AWJ – but Beard and Co will just about cope. Backs to the wall, the trip to Dublin could be a feisty affair, probably a loss, with Scotland then arriving in Cardiff to further torment Wales. A trip to London before hosting France may well see Wales looking at the Italy clash as their only win.
Italy: Ethiopia thrashed them twice: It may have been 90-odd years ago, but it seems about that long since the debate around their participation in the 6 Nations started. Lots of hype around how their junior sides are doing, how Benetton deservedly won whatever trophy it was during lockdown, how they’re producing a few decent players and are on an upward trajectory, but let’s face it, there’s more likelihood of the wolf actually suckling Romulus and Remus than this lot winning a match this season. And unlike the Colosseum, there’s little glorious or inspiring about the wreck that is Italian rugby. It’s a good thing you stir boiling water with a wooden spoon, because at least this squad will have plenty to choose from to make a plate of pasta. They’ll be competitive for bits and bobs in some matches, but really, Georgia would be a better bet, as we all know.
Springboks to Cruise it! Obviously leaving the best for last, so you can all savour that stunning last morsel, sated at the end by the power, subtlety, grace and deftness of the cornucopia of delights put on offer by the Boks, and washed down with crystal pure water served by the humble Waterboy himself. Can’t go into too much detail though because curiously the squad and fixtures don’t seem to be up anywhere. Doesn’t matter: five away matches, five wins, five bonus points and rightfully scratching New Zealand and Australia off Bill in 87 and 91 as an added bonus. Easy peasy. Siya Kolisi named player of the tournament, player of the year, new United Nations Secretary General and Commander of Space for Humanity.
You’ll be astounded to learn that this was the work of Deebee7.
Further Reading
Don’t miss BK’s fabulous graph of xenophobes v poachers.
Anyone who fancies a good old discussion about who should wear the 12 shirt for England can go here.
Onna telly this week
Friday 4th February
| Gloucester v London Irish | 19:45 | BT Sport 1 |
| France U20 v Italy U20 | 20:00 | BBC iPlayer |
| Ireland U20 v Wales U20 | 20:00 | BBC iPlayer / S4C / RTÉ2 |
| Scotland U20 v England U20 | 20:00 | BBC iPlayer |
| Ulster v Connacht | 20:15 | BBC2 NI / TG4 / Premier Sports 1 |
Saturday 5th February
| Bulls v Lions | 13:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Ireland v Wales | 14:15 | S4C / ITV / RTÉ2 |
| Stormers v Sharks | 15:05 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Scotland v England | 16:45 | BBC1 |
| Toulon v Castres | 20:00 | Premier Sports 2 |
Sunday 6th February
| Harlequins v Sale | 13:00 | BT Sport 1 | ||
| France v Italy | 15:00 | ITV / RTÉ2 | ||
| Biarritz v La Rochelle | 17:30 | Premier Sports 1 | ||
| Clermont v Bordeaux | 20:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
Ovally Balls 
there’s cream for that.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Twatt, on the Orkneys, is a favourite.
Piel Island has been getting a lot of sniggering attention here lately, not because they’re looking for a new regent, but because (as TomP knows) piel is Afrikaans slang for penis. Apparenly not a lot of South Africans sending their CVs to become the king of penis island.
LikeLike
A mate of mine’s uncle is one Richard Aird. Your uncle’s a dick aird, is he? got me a swift clip to the head.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Also, when visiting Loch Hourn, it is important to remember to harvest a bag of clappy-doos (as near to low tide mark as possible) for your tea later.
LikeLike
Craigs, Sammy Wilson, the guy at 3 minutes 40 that isn’t Ali G, attended the same school as my grandmother had. The novelist Glenn Patterson, also a student at the school, says he ‘looks and sounds like the wee lad who slabbered at you from the back of the bus’.
Wilson said people should go to the chippy if there are food shortages in the supermarkets post-Brexit. A Belfast chippy owner set him straight:
LikeLiked by 5 people
Thaum,
Sue’s read Hamnet, and really enjoyed it, though she said it was very sad in parts. I must get round to it – thanks for recommendation.
I’m working my way through Ulysses on audiobook at the moment (read it ten years ago or more). I’d forgotten how Hamletty it gets – particularly the bits about Shakespeare being Hamlet’s father and Claudius Shakespeare’s brother who’s having an affair with Anne Hathaway, and Hamnet being Hamlet – or not. It’s a bit confusing…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lad
LikeLike
One of the supplies, in a previous job, was Wayne Kerr.
He used to single-handedly lift glass display cabinets off the back of a truck, so you didn’t make any comments.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I worked with a Leong Dong. He was a dick.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Guess whoever hired him went for the low hanging fruit.
When are sides announced for this weekend? Tomorrow?
LikeLike
I’ve got some inside juice on the England team:
9. Ben Youngs (Leicester Tigers, 113 caps)
LikeLiked by 1 person
LikeLike
Sneak? Sneak? We weren’t sneaksing, Precious, were we? Master is very cruel to poor Sméagol.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Think it’s one of those occasions where the headline doesn’t match the content.
LikeLike
Ticht, I was fortunate to play in Leven, Ludin, Monifieth and even Carnoustie (the 3 courses) a few years ago. We also stopped at Kingbarns , just to look at the place. Wow. Beautiful, beautiful course.
Wish we could’ve played in Gullane, North Berthwick etc… but no time left.
Some day, I’d love to e able to rent a mobil home and just wander around Scotland , playing here and there.
LikeLike
If we are listing funny names then I used to have email correspondence with Igor Fuksmen at a previous job.
Not. Making. That. Up.
LikeLike
Sexy out. France by 99.3
LikeLike
Chimpie, Carberry was pretty good in the AIs. Good to see that Ireland have retained a sensible balance in terms of provincial representation.
LikeLike
Every time Carbery starts to get a run of games for Ireland he seems to get broken. Shame for the lad as he’s got the talent.
LikeLike
Ireland: Keenan; Conway, Ringrose, Aki, Hansen; Carbery, Gibson-Park; Porter, Kelleher, Furlong; Beirne, Ryan (c); Doris, van der Flier, Conan.
Replacements: Sheehan, Healy, Bealham, Henderson, O’Mahony, Murray, Carty, Henshaw.
Is that an Ulster count of 1 again?
LikeLike
toonie gonna be toonie
15. Stuart Hogg – Exeter Chiefs – (Captain) – 89 caps
14. Darcy Graham – Edinburgh Rugby – 23 caps
13. Chris Harris – Gloucester Rugby – 32 caps
12. Sione Tuipulotu – Glasgow Warriors – 2 caps
11. Duhan van der Merwe – Worcester Warriors – 14 caps
10. Finn Russell – Racing 92 – (Vice-Captain) – 59 caps
9. Ali Price – Glasgow Warriors – 47 caps
1. Pierre Schoeman – Edinburgh Rugby – 5 caps
2. Stuart McInally – Edinburgh Rugby – 44 caps
3. WP Nel – Edinburgh Rugby – 44 caps
4. Jonny Gray – Exeter Chiefs – 65 caps
5. Grant Gilchrist – Edinburgh Rugby – (Vice-Captain) – 49 caps
6. Sam Skinner – Exeter Chiefs – 16 caps
7. Hamish Watson – Edinburgh Rugby – 46 caps
8. Matt Fagerson – Glasgow Warriors – 18 caps
Replacements
16. George Turner – Glasgow Warriors – 21 caps
17. Rory Sutherland – Worcester Warriors – 17 caps
18. Zander Fagerson – Glasgow Warriors – 43 caps
19. Magnus Bradbury – Edinburgh Rugby – 15 caps
20. Rory Darge – Glasgow Warriors – Uncapped
21. Ben White – London Irish – 1 cap
22. Blair Kinghorn – Edinburgh Rugby – 28 caps
23. Cameron Redpath – Bath Rugby – 1 cap
LikeLike
Ritchie has had hamstring surgery, out for the rest of the 6N. doesn’t sound like the sort of thing you come back from quickly. Real shame
Johnson out completely is a bit of a surprise. Still, be interesting to see what Tuipolutu can bring.
complete switching of the front rows is an odd move.
3 locks starting & 2 back rows on the bench. Again, interesting. Absence of Ritchie will leave us a bit under resourced at the breakdown which is a worry given Wales’ strength here.
Excited to see what Darge can do.
Redpath. Hurrah!
LikeLike
Tuipolutu’s defence gives me the Fear, he brings a fair degree of Bosch going forward.
Interesting choice of front rows, obviously Toonie wants to finish strongly and bringing on last week’s starters in the second half is not a bad choice.
It’s actually less risky with Nel anyway, if your tighthead gets injured after five minutes I’d prefer the younger guy to come on a nd play out 75 minutes
It’s good to see Darge’s form get rewarded.
LikeLike
It’s actually less risky with Nel anyway, if your tighthead gets injured after five minutes I’d prefer the younger guy to come on a nd play out 75 minutes
For some reason this statement brings up bad feelings. I can’t think why.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Craigs, neither can I.
LikeLiked by 2 people
looking them up, during that WC final, Cole was three years younger than Nel is now.
WP is 36 in April.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’d be happier if Carbery had had a run of games – still, his chance to show us what he can do. FR replacements don’t fill me with any confidence – Healy’s day has – I think – gone. It would be nice to see if McGrath could get back to the heights of 2017…. Bealham – makes me nervous.
Otherwise – as you’d expect… Henderson was never going to dislodge Beirne or Ryan (well, not coming back from injury into a winning team).
LikeLike
Wales: L Williams; Cuthbert, Watkin, Tompkins, Rees-Zammit; Biggar (capt), T Williams; W Jones, Elias, Francis, Rowlands, Beard, Basham, Morgan, Moriarty.
Replacements: Lake, G Thomas, D Lewis, S Davies, Wainwright, G Davies, Sheedy, J Davies.
LikeLike
Nae Adams
Injured or dropped I wonder?
LikeLike
Chimpie – yep, one Ulsterman. Onna bench.
LikeLike
‘sanoutrage.
LikeLike
Wales – no Adams? injured or on the naughty step? I’m guessing some kind of inury as Cuthbert is in for McNicoll. Otherwise, you just put Adams back where he’s best.
LikeLike
15. Jamie Osborne 14. Tommy O’Brien 13. Rory O’Loughlin 12. Ciarán Frawley 11. Dave Kearney 10. Ross Byrne
9. Nick McCarthy
1. Ed Byrne 2. James Tracy 3. Michael Ala’alatoa 4. Ross Molony 5. Josh Murphy 6. Rhys Ruddock (captain)
7. Scott Penny 8. Max Deegan
16. Seán Cronin 17. Peter Dooley 18. Vakh Abdaladze 19. Devin Toner 20. Martin Moloney 21. Luke McGrath 22. Harry Byrne 23. Rob Russell
LikeLike
All power to Zane Kirchner:
https://www.leinsterrugby.ie/where-are-they-now-zane-kirchner/
LikeLike
Adams injured according to WoL
Can’t see why Cuthbert is in for McNicol (bigger to counter McDuhan?).
Great to see young Jac Morgan in, pity he’s a 7 when we need an 8.
Scotland by 31.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hi BRB, good to see you.
LikeLiked by 1 person
TomP: I’m still here, just quiet. Usually you or CMW will already have said whatever I was going to say as I am glacially slow to the breakdown. Except today – my Taine Basham moment as I swoop in with actual facts.
LikeLiked by 5 people
LikeLiked by 3 people
The most recent South African to be named in an Edinburgh side is Kwagga van Niekerk, he played for the Scotland 20s a couple of years ago.
To be honest he wasn’t even the best back row in the Watsonians side during the Super 6 in the Autumn, but the Edinburgh coaches obviously see something in him and he lines up on the bench against that very experienced Leinster side that TomP posted.
I can’t see anything other than our regular shoeing at the RDS happening. I think the last time we played Leinster at home was in March 2019 when we won, I had a quick look and that’s what wiki seems to tell me. Obviously there is no intent, but it just seems bad luck on our part.
Hopefully we’ll play them in Edinburgh next season.
LikeLike
The Glasgow stats guy has tweeted that Scotland are looking to emulate South Africa’s use of their front row resources but we can’t use the name Bomb Squad.
He has suggested Bam Squad instead.
LikeLiked by 1 person
ticht, same school as Jaco van der Walt and Nathan McBeth. van Niekerk and McBeth played on the same team in 2016 and at Craven Week for Deebee’s Golden Lions that year as well.
LikeLike
I’m going to the library next to the RDS later so will listen out for any Scottish accents on the way and wish your lads the best, ticht.
LikeLike
The Leinster reserve back row is Martin Moloney from Old Belvedere (from Athy really but OB is his Dublin club). About the same age as van Niekerk and with only one appearance for Leinster so far.
He hasn’t turned out for Old Belvedere this season I don’t think but neither has he for Leinster. There was an interview with the excellent Scott Penny the other day in which he said he’s played a couple of league games for his club side just because the Leinster season’s been chopped up by Covid. Good thing about the Scottish system is that some of your lads can play Super 6 otherwise it’s just training, training and more training.
I suppose in the Irish system they have development fixtures between the provinces and also provinces v the Irish Under 20 team. Are there a few matches a year between Edinburgh and Glasgow reserve sides? Or even against Newcastle or Sale reserves?
There’s a lad from Belfast who plays for Old Belvedere called John McKee who’s in the Leinster Academy. Hope to see get a chance maybe later in the season.
LikeLike
@Ticht
I see Muncaster who was no8 with U20s last year is playing at 6. He was a punishing ball carrier vs Ireland IIRC
(and won 4 lineouts – https://www.sixnationsrugby.com/report/ireland-under-20s-hit-the-ground-running-with-win-over-scotland#match-stats)
LikeLike
Thaum – you have mail. Also, I’m blocked by Russ for mentioning his horrible sex blog so that’s quite funny.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Trisk, he is a very strong ball carrier, not the tallest number 8 or 6 you’ll see but he is good with the ball in hand.
He was strong enough to hold a scoring line the other week despite a shoulder charge from a Brive lock, some of their “tackling” the night was awful
5mins 20secs on this if it doesn’t start at the time stamp
LikeLike
Tom, the Super 6 runs from the last weekend in July to the middle of October, these guys are not allowed to play club rugby due to the discrepancy in their strength & conditioning training compared to amateurs (all other forms of professionalism have been stopped in Scottish rugby).
There has been one Edinburgh A v Glasgow A game since the final of the S6.
A few of the players have made it into the 7s squad, but otherwise it’s just training training for them too.
There was talk about setting up fixtures and leagues against Welsh and Irish opposition, but that seems to have taken a back seat for now.
LikeLike
Youngs! Dropped!
LikeLike
Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll be back for the bigger games.
LikeLike
England team to face Italy:
Steward; Malins, Marchant, Slade, Nowell; Smith, Randall; Genge, George, Stuart, Ewels, Isiekwe, Itoje, Curry (capt), Dombrandt.
Replacements: Cowan-Dickie, Marler, Sinckler, Chessum, Simmonds, Youngs, Ford, Daly.
Itoje at 6 – why, ffs?
LikeLike