It’s Christmas in July as the Northern behemoths head south to upside-down-world and a feast of rugby! With this being the last July tour before the World Cup next year in France, there are markers to be put down, there are points to be made and there are matches to be won! Not the usual ‘development tours’ we see, but full-blooded Tests, with a capital T and an exclamation mark to boot. So who’ll be the turkeys (not Türkiye, as they’re not playing anyway), who’ll get a stuffing and who’ll provide the trimmings and the sauce? A veritable smorgasbord awaits:
Romania v Italy
After slaying the Welsh dragon in February, there’ll be a sprightly step in the Italian dressing room before facing off with a Romanian side that lost its last two matches (narrowly to let’s-replace-Italy-with-Georgia, and more convincingly to Spain) to end a decent five match winning streak prior to that. Solid second tier, but not enough to get past Italy, who broke a 36-match losing streak at the Principality with THAT try. It won’t be a canter, but Italy should start their summer series with a fairly comfortable win: Italy by 15 over Romania
Australia ‘A’ v Samoa
Much talk around the improvement of Australian sides in Super Rugby this year, but frankly I’m not sure where that came from. A couple of wins against Kiwi sides masked the fact that they only got one side in the semis and propped up the bottom of the combined table along with the Samoan and Fijian sides. The Brumbies were the only consistent side in Australia, but they’ll have too much depth anyway to field an ‘A’ side that will see off Samoa easily enough. No idea what to expect from Samoa, or who they’ve selected, but history tells us they’ll be blood and thunder for 60 minutes, whilst still getting the wrong end of the scoreboard and cards, and fade away as the superior conditioning and game plan of the Aussies takes control: Australia ‘A’ by 23
Fiji v Tonga
A spicy affair for sure, although Fiji have emerged as the most consistent of the Pacific Island sides in recent years, combining some electric running from all 15 (or 23) players at times, with brutal defence and a set piece that’s better than most of their neighbours. It’ll be fierce, it’ll be fast, it’ll be fun to watch from afar, but ultimately Fiji will have too much: Fiji by 13
Japan v France
Two of the world’s great cultures and two of the world’s great cuisines. Most recent and next hosts of rugby’s great showpiece. Two sides renowned for silky skills and derring-do with ball in hand, but that’s where it ends, I’m afraid. France are building up a fearsome head of steam in the lead up to their home World Cup and have oodles of talent and power in most positions, led by Dupont and Ntamack at 9 and 10, behind a pack that won’t step back for anyone. Japan have been solid recently, with good wins over second-tier sides and running the likes of Scotland, Australia and Ireland relatively close (bar one blowout against Ireland), so they have the wherewithal to mix it with the big boys. However, this is a France on a mission and they should stroll away with it in the end: France by 33
New Zealand v Ireland
One of the most eagerly awaited July series, with Ireland having got the measure of the Kiwis in recent years. But not in New Zealand. Both sides come into the series with question marks hanging over them – the All Black pack got dusted in Dublin and flayed in France last year and they’ve gone with Scott Barrett at 6 in an effort to bolster the lineout and scrum. Worked a treat in the 2019 Semi against England, didn’t it? Ireland’s Leinster-dominated side has struggled against top packs, but they’ll probably fancy they’ve got the wood on the Kiwis up front. The AB backline has suffered some Covid disruptions, but such is the depth of talent in New Zealand, they’ll be fine there. The noises coming out of New Zealand are ominous and they’ll throw everything at Ireland this week. Perhaps overly generous, but it’s New Zealand by 17
Australia v England
Another hugely anticipated match as Eddie’s eagles got their wings clipped in the 6N, amidst rumblings around his sometimes leftfield selections. Australia have been building quietly under Dave Rennie and demolished a Bok scrum last year thought to be their key weapon. The Aussies always bring that mongrel spirit to matches like this and they won’t back down against England’s forwards. It’s an intriguing match-up with England’s centres – as ever – a topic of debate and the backs in general, from 9 to 15, with the exception perhaps of Marcus Smith being anything but nailed on. Both sides are actually a little unsettled and it could go either way, with the match-up between Smith and Cooper at 10 a key contest. Australia will look to run England around the park, whilst England will look to smother the Aussies before letting loose later on. Could go either way, I’m backing Rennie’s Roos to break some hoodoos: Australia by 2
South Africa v Wales
Everyone in Wales apparently thinks the Boks will smash Wales. So does everyone here. Except for the people who think it’ll be a tight, ugly affair. Of which I’m one. The Boks are generally slow out of the starting blocks in the international season and are probably most vulnerable in this first Test. That said, it’s a pretty settled squad, with most of the players in their prime, or near enough. They’ve all played together for a few seasons and so should be settled enough. Wales, on the other hand, have come off a horror 6 Nations, only winning one match and losing to Italy in the final match – but they also got three losing bonus points, so three tight defeats. Whatever the missing links are in the Welsh side, it’s not guts and defence and bloody-mindedness. And the matches between Wales and South Africa have been tight in recent years, so I expect another tight affair, with the Boks perhaps easing away at altitude later on: South Africa by 9
Argentina v Scotland
This has all the potential to be a cracker, with Argentina now under the tutelage of Michael Cheika and with some of the Euro-based players back in the fold. Having stunned the ABs in 2020 and played some fabulous rugby in the process, they slipped back badly in 2021, winning only one match, against Italy. Scotland’s all-new, all-singing, all-dancing style fell a bit flat in the 6 Nations after a promising start and the Scots once again failed to live up to expectations. That said, they have some wonderful, athletic forwards and some serious gas out wide that can blitz most defences on its day. This could be a great match. Would back Argentina’s 2020 version, but not the 2021 version, albeit they’ve changed management and got a few players back: Scotland by 5
Merrily foretold by Deebee7
Onna telly this week
Thursday 30th June
| Scotland v Italy (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
| Wales v Georgia (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Saturday 2nd July
| Japan v France | 07:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| New Zealand v Ireland | 08:00 | Sky Sports Action |
| Australia v England | 10:55 | Sky Sports Action |
| South Africa v Wales | 16:05 | Sky Sports Action |
| Argentina v Scotland | 20:10 | Sky Sports Main Event |
Tuesday 5th July
| France v South Africa (U20s) | 16:00 | YouTube |
| England v Ireland (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Wednesday 6th July
| Scotland v Georgia (U20s) | 16:00 | YouTube |
| Wales v Italy (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Ovally Balls 
“as we were standing by the side of the road by an upturned car, every neighbour in a 10 mile radius passed by in a cortege behind the hearse taking the coffin to the church…..”
Ever since he moved to Galway my brother’s been telling me they do these things properly in Ireland…
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“the loose change falling out of my pockets as we rotated”
Anyone else minded to rotate Trisk at the next OB/AoD meet-up?
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A few years back I was cycling to the station to get to work when a van passed and I got a waft of some very strong weed. This used to happen a couple of times a week so I wasn’t overly surprised.
There’s a railway bridge at the end of a fast straight road which has a sharp left hand turn straight after and the van that had passed me was on it’s side having hit 2 oncoming cars. One which had smashed backwards through a wall and was balanced precariously over a drop down to someone’s garden below.
The drivers passenger had got out but the drivers leg was trapped and he was in a lot of pain. I tried smashing the window of the car perched in the edge but couldn’t and waited for the fire service to turn up shortly after.
Don’t get high and drive kids. Especially at 0730am.
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“I tried smashing the window of the car perched in the edge but couldn’t and waited for the fire service to turn up shortly after.”
Craigs upping the heroism content from his previous story but dropping in effectiveness. No good will come of it.
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they do these things properly in Ireland…
Yeah, still. For example, the main cemetery here is about 4km outside the town (up on a hill, overlooking the lakes and mountains – not a bad place to spend eternity).
So, after the funeral Mass people will walk behind the hearse after it leaves the cathedral (yeah, got one of those).
As the procession moves along, the guards will hold up traffic and the old school shopkeepers will turn off their lights or close the doors….
At the top of High St, the family will thank some of the people walking and then everyone jumps into their cars to complete the journey to the cemetery and the burial. This allows you to bale if you’ve other commitments….
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Seems like Wuss have gone ‘pop’ and maybe Wasps aren’t that far behind
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Who could possibly have seen that coming?
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……………stunned!
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For our Irish correspondents:
The message is all well and good, but this does not sound like a Derry man at all, at all?
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Morning all, lurking from Nigeria, with little connectivity every time it rains. Which is all the time.
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Bumped into Chekh on a train. He’s still alive. Thought he’d moved house to stop these encounters but this seems to have been a bluff.
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It’s DCC’s birthday today.
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HB to DCC! And an extra Bravo for KeithNoir.
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Interesting update , Refit. Something stinks bad about that.
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Sounds very Tory.
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On other news, some insane knock on consequences from the Supreme Court Roe vs Wade madness. A good friend has recently been diagnosed with an advanced aggressive cancer, bit of a shock, fit healthy active until very recently. Fast acting doc and on the ball onco team have him strting treatment this week. His oncologist ( in CT ) has also referred him to one of the big cancer specialist hospitals in Boston (Mass), to check in to research/ experimental options. Turns out that it is now illegal to transfer medical records interstate unless the doctor concerned is registered and insured in both states, as it may be possible to accidentally transfer abortion information with the medical files. For the record, he is male, and 67 years old, so unlikely to be looking for an abortion, which in any case, is, and will remain, legal in both states.
Good fucking grief.
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Sbt – sorry to hear that mate.
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Happy Birthday Cat! And many many more! Unlike England World Cup wins. Cough.
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Every time I think things are massively fucked up here, I look to the US and think it could be worse.
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this does not sound like a Derry man at all
Bit of the native accent left but highly “deracinated” as a work colleague once put it ….
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Yes, but the deracinated (great word!) accent was a southern one, not a Derry one….
Me auld da grew up in Derry, and I have seen Derry Girls!
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Just back from a few days in Mersea.
I liked the place, it is very chilled if you ignore the “obviously from London money”
There is sod all there, I think that is why I liked it. There is a vineyard and a few cafes, lots of oyster and sea food places, but I avoided them due to my having had a very bad, like very very bad case of food poisoning from mussels in my early 20s, and with the news of the defiling of the seas and rivers, I thought it best to give it all a miss.
In any other circumstance I’d be all over the 50p closed, 70p opened oysters, but nah, and although I love sea food I still get those mental shutters that come down after a few.
Anyway, Mersea is good if you like quiet walks along the beach and Colchester has a castle and wee streets.
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I once got confused when people said they were going to “Mersey” when they actually meant Mersea.
I went past there on Monday on my way to Copdock in Suffolk for an u9s/10s cricket festival. Don’t think I saw you.
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Thaum – I fixed my computer but them went on holiday. Won’t be sending you my amazing story for a few weeks I’m afraid.
I have another one about how my car battery was drained when I was trying to get to the airport at 0330am. Luckily my next door neighbour* but one is a cabbie and a legend so we were fine (and are now happily on holiday).**
* he’s a very old school (definitely Man of Kent) dude with half his ear missing and our bond has been forged in the furnace of mutual hatred of the fire starting neighbours.
** that would be it though. If you want to copy those 2 sentences and write ‘by Craigsman’, I have no objections.
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@craigs
Did you wake him up to jump start your car or to take you to the airport?
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OT – both it turns out. My car has a massive battery hidden under a load of plastic. So his car battery wasn’t powerful enough.
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accent was a southern one
Compared to Derry (and Donegal) every other accent is a southern one …. and from this neck of the woods, “northern” accents tend to start in Longford….
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Someone, who shall remain nameless*, left the phone charger in the cigarette thingy overnight.
* name rhymes with braids.
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Mrs. Craigs ?
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“I once got confused when people said they were going to “Mersey” when they actually meant Mersea.”
I got confused too, I first pronounced it Mercia and thought it was part of the old Anglo Saxon thingy, but no.
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Sbt – keep guessing
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This is a hell of a thread
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For all my friends out there – and good luck tomorrow:
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Bloody hell, Aus have started quick. SA knock-on from Nic White’s kick-off and Aus go through the phases. They get close down the far wing, before McReight threads the needle, between two defenders, to score.
7-0 2mins
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Pollard currently 1/3 on pen kicks. Finally gets one over from straight ahead.
10-3 23mins
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Marx (on as a blood replacement) does his best Beast impression, as PSdT over-extends, reaching for a restart. He manages to hold the big(er) man safely, as he rolls over his head.
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SA are mincing the Aus scrum. They get a pen on the Aus line and Wright gets a yellow for no retreating after a quick tap. Aus do well to hold up a SA player over the line. Another scrum.
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Aus on a pen warning, after their 9th infringement. SA pressuring the line.
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SA maul and, when it collapses, they go wide. Mapimpi go for a spectacular dive into the corner, but Koroibete swats him out of the air.
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Aus scrum on their own line. Faf swats at the ball as White picks it up from the scrum, but catches White in the face accidentally. Faf gets a yellow for contact to the face.
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Half time. 10-3
Aus were good for the first 5 mins (and then little bursts), but SA have been dominant with pressure for most of the half. Pollard has missed 2 pens and SA haven’t managed to convert their pressure to tries.
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Aus score a second try. Wright makes good ground down the wing, before flicking the ball inside to Hodge. SA try to hold him up, but tackle is called and White throws it wide. It gets to Koroibete, who mis-foots Pollard and makes it to the line.
Conversion missed. 15-3 49mins.
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Oh, that was a lovely Aus try. Ruck just inside the SA half. White passes to Slipper, who pops it back inside to Lolesio, who bursts through a gap. He passes to McReight, just before he’s tackled, before the line, who scores.
22-3 58mins
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SA finally get a try. Paisami gets isolated in midfield and Kolisi turns him over. Vincent Koch takes an inside ball and breaks the line. He plays it safe and passes to Kwagga, before contact, who scores.
25-10 75mins
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Valentini binned in the 79th minute, for repeated team infringements.
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Kwagga gets his second. Quick tap, rolls through the contact and reaches out an arm to score.
Final score 25-17
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Mo’unga misses an early penalty. Bofelli puts Arg ahead with one of his own.
NZ put a pen into the corner and they maul over the line. 5-3 12mins
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Well done Refit……………………McReight’s try was a beauty
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NZ try out of nothing. ARG lineout on the near side. It’s overthrown and the NZ hookers picks it up. NZ go wide, Jordan breaks the line then passes to Clarke, who scores.
15-6. 33 mins
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