It’s Christmas in July as the Northern behemoths head south to upside-down-world and a feast of rugby! With this being the last July tour before the World Cup next year in France, there are markers to be put down, there are points to be made and there are matches to be won! Not the usual ‘development tours’ we see, but full-blooded Tests, with a capital T and an exclamation mark to boot. So who’ll be the turkeys (not Türkiye, as they’re not playing anyway), who’ll get a stuffing and who’ll provide the trimmings and the sauce? A veritable smorgasbord awaits:
Romania v Italy
After slaying the Welsh dragon in February, there’ll be a sprightly step in the Italian dressing room before facing off with a Romanian side that lost its last two matches (narrowly to let’s-replace-Italy-with-Georgia, and more convincingly to Spain) to end a decent five match winning streak prior to that. Solid second tier, but not enough to get past Italy, who broke a 36-match losing streak at the Principality with THAT try. It won’t be a canter, but Italy should start their summer series with a fairly comfortable win: Italy by 15 over Romania
Australia ‘A’ v Samoa
Much talk around the improvement of Australian sides in Super Rugby this year, but frankly I’m not sure where that came from. A couple of wins against Kiwi sides masked the fact that they only got one side in the semis and propped up the bottom of the combined table along with the Samoan and Fijian sides. The Brumbies were the only consistent side in Australia, but they’ll have too much depth anyway to field an ‘A’ side that will see off Samoa easily enough. No idea what to expect from Samoa, or who they’ve selected, but history tells us they’ll be blood and thunder for 60 minutes, whilst still getting the wrong end of the scoreboard and cards, and fade away as the superior conditioning and game plan of the Aussies takes control: Australia ‘A’ by 23
Fiji v Tonga
A spicy affair for sure, although Fiji have emerged as the most consistent of the Pacific Island sides in recent years, combining some electric running from all 15 (or 23) players at times, with brutal defence and a set piece that’s better than most of their neighbours. It’ll be fierce, it’ll be fast, it’ll be fun to watch from afar, but ultimately Fiji will have too much: Fiji by 13
Japan v France
Two of the world’s great cultures and two of the world’s great cuisines. Most recent and next hosts of rugby’s great showpiece. Two sides renowned for silky skills and derring-do with ball in hand, but that’s where it ends, I’m afraid. France are building up a fearsome head of steam in the lead up to their home World Cup and have oodles of talent and power in most positions, led by Dupont and Ntamack at 9 and 10, behind a pack that won’t step back for anyone. Japan have been solid recently, with good wins over second-tier sides and running the likes of Scotland, Australia and Ireland relatively close (bar one blowout against Ireland), so they have the wherewithal to mix it with the big boys. However, this is a France on a mission and they should stroll away with it in the end: France by 33
New Zealand v Ireland
One of the most eagerly awaited July series, with Ireland having got the measure of the Kiwis in recent years. But not in New Zealand. Both sides come into the series with question marks hanging over them – the All Black pack got dusted in Dublin and flayed in France last year and they’ve gone with Scott Barrett at 6 in an effort to bolster the lineout and scrum. Worked a treat in the 2019 Semi against England, didn’t it? Ireland’s Leinster-dominated side has struggled against top packs, but they’ll probably fancy they’ve got the wood on the Kiwis up front. The AB backline has suffered some Covid disruptions, but such is the depth of talent in New Zealand, they’ll be fine there. The noises coming out of New Zealand are ominous and they’ll throw everything at Ireland this week. Perhaps overly generous, but it’s New Zealand by 17
Australia v England
Another hugely anticipated match as Eddie’s eagles got their wings clipped in the 6N, amidst rumblings around his sometimes leftfield selections. Australia have been building quietly under Dave Rennie and demolished a Bok scrum last year thought to be their key weapon. The Aussies always bring that mongrel spirit to matches like this and they won’t back down against England’s forwards. It’s an intriguing match-up with England’s centres – as ever – a topic of debate and the backs in general, from 9 to 15, with the exception perhaps of Marcus Smith being anything but nailed on. Both sides are actually a little unsettled and it could go either way, with the match-up between Smith and Cooper at 10 a key contest. Australia will look to run England around the park, whilst England will look to smother the Aussies before letting loose later on. Could go either way, I’m backing Rennie’s Roos to break some hoodoos: Australia by 2
South Africa v Wales
Everyone in Wales apparently thinks the Boks will smash Wales. So does everyone here. Except for the people who think it’ll be a tight, ugly affair. Of which I’m one. The Boks are generally slow out of the starting blocks in the international season and are probably most vulnerable in this first Test. That said, it’s a pretty settled squad, with most of the players in their prime, or near enough. They’ve all played together for a few seasons and so should be settled enough. Wales, on the other hand, have come off a horror 6 Nations, only winning one match and losing to Italy in the final match – but they also got three losing bonus points, so three tight defeats. Whatever the missing links are in the Welsh side, it’s not guts and defence and bloody-mindedness. And the matches between Wales and South Africa have been tight in recent years, so I expect another tight affair, with the Boks perhaps easing away at altitude later on: South Africa by 9
Argentina v Scotland
This has all the potential to be a cracker, with Argentina now under the tutelage of Michael Cheika and with some of the Euro-based players back in the fold. Having stunned the ABs in 2020 and played some fabulous rugby in the process, they slipped back badly in 2021, winning only one match, against Italy. Scotland’s all-new, all-singing, all-dancing style fell a bit flat in the 6 Nations after a promising start and the Scots once again failed to live up to expectations. That said, they have some wonderful, athletic forwards and some serious gas out wide that can blitz most defences on its day. This could be a great match. Would back Argentina’s 2020 version, but not the 2021 version, albeit they’ve changed management and got a few players back: Scotland by 5
Merrily foretold by Deebee7
Onna telly this week
Thursday 30th June
| Scotland v Italy (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
| Wales v Georgia (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Saturday 2nd July
| Japan v France | 07:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| New Zealand v Ireland | 08:00 | Sky Sports Action |
| Australia v England | 10:55 | Sky Sports Action |
| South Africa v Wales | 16:05 | Sky Sports Action |
| Argentina v Scotland | 20:10 | Sky Sports Main Event |
Tuesday 5th July
| France v South Africa (U20s) | 16:00 | YouTube |
| England v Ireland (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Wednesday 6th July
| Scotland v Georgia (U20s) | 16:00 | YouTube |
| Wales v Italy (U20s) | 19:00 | YouTube |
Ovally Balls 
Boffelli kicks his 4th pen right on half time, keeping ARG in the game.
15-12 at oranges.
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Argentina have been up to the task so far, Boff’s kicking is very good, as per.
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NZ kick a penalty for a (dubious) tackle off the ball. From the kickoff, Scott Barrett fumbles the ball and Gonzales gets the ball and breaks the line to score in the corner.
18-19 Arg 48mins
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This NZ being a bit shit by their standards is all very well, but with the World Cup in mind I don’t like the Australia getting better again thing so much.
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Vamos Pumas
Brilliant
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Poor old Wales in the tough half of the draw with Australia, Argentina and England.
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Great result for Argentina, wow!
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Ach, you’ve got a chance against at least one of those.
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Real possibility of Los Pumas winning the tournament. And SA are last. Poor Deebee*.
*kidding**.
** kidding***.
*** okay I really am kidding.
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There’s so much hate in the world at the moment-everyone should, please, listen to this:
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Dunno Slade, there’s always a little room for some focused dislike :-) (old now but relevant).
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Relevant to our side of the Atlantic I should say.
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Slade – well, apart from Cat Stevens being a misogynist twat imo, sure. (Sorry, I can’t stand him.)
However, agree with your sentiment, of course!
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Thaum – didn’t he also support the Rushdie fatwa?
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Yeah he said this in response to a question about the prophet:
“He must be killed. The Qur’an makes it clear – if someone defames the prophet, then he must die.”
Sorry Slade, I like the message, but the guy delivering just isn’t the man to make such statements.
Unless he’s retracted this/grown up but I don’t think he has. Can’t find anything anyway.
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https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cat_Stevens%27_comments_about_Salman_Rushdie
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Well – that’s me in my place………….
We’ve all been young and foolish but I still think he is a sincere man.
….and his music is sublime
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Slade – it’s always possible to separate the art from the artist if that helps. Lovecraft, for example.
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Spice Girls too.
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Russ Abbott
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Errr Dan…
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………context:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cat_Stevens
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You’ve all seen these stickers on cars?
Saw a car once with one of those on the left-hand side of the rear window, and an identically laid out one on the right-hand side that said ‘Think dog, think dogging’.
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Not sure what context Cat Stevens’ Wikipedia page is going to provide for this dogging business.
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It is extremely long and detailed though so I guess everyone is busy catting their way to the end of it.
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Well this is some bullshit:
https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/aug/28/better-late-than-never-gibraltar-becomes-city-after-180-year-delay
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The smallest recognised city in the UK is St David’s in Wales, which boasts a population of 1,841.
Nope, not even a town.
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The only decent thing about the rugby on Saturday is that it propelled me to the top of the AoD Superbru leaderboard. I picked Australia by 8. I feel dirty.
I didn’t actually see the match, as I got back from Nigeria at 6am our time (match started at 7:30am) and Mrs Deebee had organised a community clean up day for the empty piece of land next to our complex. Was lovely picking up other people’s trash having not slept in 48 hours.
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And I knocked AVS off top spot.
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@Craigs – I can promise you that anywhere big enough to have a secondary school in that neck of the woods is definitely a town. Or in St David’s case a city. Bigger than the City of London, don’t you know.
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@deebee
JJ Smuts flew home on Sunday. Upminster is in mourning.
Seriously though he made a great impression. Everyone loved him and want him to come back next year.
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OT, I’m sure he’ll be happy to oblige too! Nice gentle few months in a balmy English summer, conjuring images of Cider With Rosie and getting paid for it too! What’s not to like?
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Cmw – it’s the dishing out of status that annoys me the most though. It seems random and more arbitrary than having a cathedral.
What does even mean now?
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Has anyone noticed that since George Smith Aussie no7s have all looked worryingly similar. Like they stole some DNA.
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@deebee
He spent a lot of time coaching so will have made a bit of dish which might go some way to tempting him back. Essex is not so much a Cider with Rosie kind of place rather than a Lager Top with Wayne vibe.
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*dosh, of course.
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Essex is not so much a Cider with Rosie kind of place rather than a Lager Top with Wayne vibe.
Ouch!
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My money is on Neil Back. If the Australian rugby union had scouted him as a teenager playing for Nottingham, they could have had their first genetic trial with Pocock, and assuming eggs in the freezer, same batch could have been used for Hooper and McReight. Eggs must have come from someone with curly hair, but everything else fits.
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Further scientific research shows that Jean Pierre Rives was 17 when Neil back was born, so it could clearly be a case of the RFU cloning him to make Neil Back, and then the Aussies obviously stealing the remaining fertilized eggs and smuggling them home on Qantas in a beer cooler.
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Altho the curly hair could be an environmental variation, all that sun , sea and sand.
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Just seen the Faf ‘assault’ on Nick White. Frankly, that’s embarrassing from White, stooping to the worst end of football theatrics. What a dick. From now on, Dick the ‘Tache he is.
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SBT, as much as Neil Back was a legend, Jean Pierre Rives broke the mould. One of my favourites of all time. I’m not sure his genes would be containable for long enough to be cloned!
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As a nipper I emulated JP Rives style of play from the 9 jersey in an orgy of furious energy, style, aggression and panache. Got mostly flattened or beaten up at the bottom of rucks, but what a glorious Tuesday afternoon it was!
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This looks like it’s gonna be great fun (and Daniel Radcliffe looks like he’s having a great time)
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SBT – it’s probably true that they have various clones in different stages of development in stasis somewhere*.
* They said that you can’t walk on Oolaroo anymore because it is sacred the locals and get upset when people fall off but I know there has to be an underground no7 lab in there.
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Look at the photo at the top of this article and tell me they didn’t just stick a moustache on Hooper(a).
https://www.planetrugby.com/fraser-mcreight-michael-hooper-touches-base-with-wallabies-two-try-hero-after-stunning-performance
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Debes – Nicolas William White (born 13 June 1990 in Scone, Australia) is an Australian rugby union player and actor
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nic_White
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Tbh, is anyone surprised that an Aussie scrum half is a dick on the field? Or maybe Faf has long fingernails.
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