Big rugby weekend too, with a lot on the line for the top 10 or so teams in the URC. Your results foretold:
Edinburgh v Munster: Edinburgh are in a must-win home game against Munster and come into the match on a three-game winning streak, although (with respect, nah, just joking) it’s only been against Zebre, Cardiff and Scarlets. Munster, on the other hand, are unbeaten since losing New Year’s Day and have thrashed Connacht at home and the Lions away after dispatching the Bulls at Loftus as well. One of the form (unsmiling Irish) teams and they’ll be good to sneak past Edinburgh.
Result: Munster by 4
Zebre Parma v Scarlets: Two pretty crappy sides who’ll gain no solace in consistency, when it’s going home empty-handed week in and out. Bald men fighting over a comb and all that. Zebre started the season with some agonisingly narrow losses, which could possibly have given them a boost to aim for higher up the table. But it wasn’t to be, and they’ve been hammered in recent weeks, with an average deficit of 32 points a match in their last three. Scarlets have been princely by comparison, losing only by about 11 a match over that period. Still, Zebre are overdue a win, it’s lazy ‘home-win punditry’ and this one would pull them off the bottom and above Scarlets (and the Drags).
Result: Zebre Parma by 2
Bulls v Benetton: The Bulls are a side that can really turn it on when they smell blood (and let’s face it, if your average Saffer can’t smell blood, they’ll batter something – not a Mars Bar – until blood spills, so they can smell it), and with a home semi still theoretically up for grabs, they’ll be at their beastly best. Benetton actually have the better recent record – three from their last four – and are also still well in the hunt for a last eight berth. A win on Saturday would probably be enough to secure a QF spot, but the Bulls will chuck everything at them and as they showed against the Warriors last weekend, when the mood takes them, they can be lethal. Saw my first opera at Loftus; this won’t be a day of song for the Italians.
Bulls by 27
Ospreys v Dragons RFC: The Ospreys can still theoretically make the top eight, if everyone above them loses their last two matches, which will be motivation enough for the men from Swansea. Might be stupid, but, you know, I’m sure their coach has been filling the airwaves with the usual guff about playing to the end, results going our way, blah blah. Battered by Leinster and the Bulls in the last couple of weeks (albeit after a fine win in Cape Town), they’re on a less-losing streak than the Doused Dragons. Only two wins this year (squeakers against the Scarlets and Zebre), suggests they’re more puff, than the magic.
Ospreys by 12
Lions v Glasgow Warriors: The Lions could really put the cat (cough) among the pigeons if they turn over Glasgow in their quest for an unlikely quarterfinal spot. Unlikely though, as the Lions have not been consistent enough this season (or any other for the last 7 years!), either dishing out hideous hidings, or being on the receiving end of brutal beatings. The Warriors showed against the Bulls last weekend that the altitude beast is a pussycat, roaring back in the last twenty to almost beat the hosts. They’re top of the table, have a wining culture this season and are damned difficult to beat. Should be a Glasgow win, quite easily actually, but….
Lions by 2
Connacht v Stormers: The Wesht is a wicked place to try to get a result, especially for Saffer sides, but as the Lions showed a few weeks ago, and down to 14 men to boot for most of the match, if you’re handling is good and you get quick ball to your strike runners, Connacht can be clobbered. The Stormers will be buoyed by their thrashing of the Drags last weekend and will look to add another Irish scalp this season after wins over Ulster and Leinster. Connacht got battered by Munster last weekend and have to go back to early January for a win against a top side – a Munster that were still finding their rhythm this season. Still a very difficult side to beat, but with places 5 to 8 so close, the Stormers will need to match the wind from the Wesht.
Stormers by 7
Sharks v Cardiff: Tricky one this, with many of the Sharks side to play Glos in the mini-Heini next weekend jetting out early. Should give the Diff a sniff, but they haven’t won since Santa Puff (see above) gave them a Boxing Day pressie. I’ve no idea what kind of Sharks combo will take to the field, but you feel that home ground advantage in what’s still a steamy Durban will see them home against a locked Diff. Nothing more to add, really.
Sharks by 8
Ulster v Leinster: A terrific Irish derby to finish the weekend with. Leinster will be hoping Glasgow get jolted in Jozi, giving them a shot at the top of the log again, whilst Ulster can still sneak a home semi, if others get stiffed (or not, as it were). Ulster have been patchy this season and have been involved in some very tight affairs (stop it, now) both for and against them. Leinster sent their U14 academy side to the land of sunshine and they got clobbered, but bounced back to batter the hapless Ospreys last weekend. It’ll be a hard, uncompromising match, with the visitors nosing ahead at the end. Sorry gracious host.
Leinster Rugby by 3
Bum steers by Deebee7
Onna telly this weekend
Showing matches that are televised in the UK and Ireland or on popular subscription services. Bold indicates that it’s on a free to view channel. Times are in the UK zone, so adjust as necessary.
Friday 17th May
| Zebre v Scarlets | 19:35 | BBC2 Wales / iPlayer / Premier Sports 2 |
| Edinburgh v Munster | 19:35 | TG4 / Premier Sports 1 |
Saturday 18th May
| Bulls v Treviso | 13:00 | PremierPlayer |
| Ospreys v Dragons | 15:00 | Premier Sports 2 |
| Lions v Glasgow | 15:05 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Bath v Northampton | 15:05 | TNT Sports Extra |
| Gloucester v Newcastle | 15:05 | TNT Sports Extra |
| Harlequins v Bristol | 15:05 | TNT Sports 2 |
| Leicester v Exeter | 15:05 | TNT Sports Extra |
| Saracens v Sale | 15:05 | TNT Sports 1 |
| Connacht v Stormers | 17:05 | RTÉ2 / Premier Sports 1 |
| Sharks v Cardiff | 17:15 | S4C / iPlayer / Premier Sports 2 |
| Ulster v Leinster | 19:35 | TG4 / Premier Sports 1 |
Ovally Balls 
Good stuff Deebs, although you obviously got your Glasgow precition wrong.
LikeLike
These are my ‘Bru picks, so what’ll actually happen is more likely to be:
Edinburgh to give Bill and WP a grand send off with a 13 point mashing of Munster
Scarlets pimpernel Zebre by 20+
Bulls still stuff Benneton
Hairsprays and Drags put on a belated Punch and Judy Christmas Panto and draw 3-3
Lions thrash the Warriors by 25 (cough), or lose by double that.
Connaught blow the Stormers away by 15
Cardiff recover from last week’s shellacking in Jozi to beat the Sharks in the worst match of the weekend.*
Leinster still batter the brave, plucky, Ulstermen.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Skweeky Week-end……………………………..excellent. I hope all enjoy
LikeLike
Treacle Toes retiring at the end of the season
https://www.bbc.com/sport/rugby-union/articles/cnl40kqje1no
LikeLike
Refit – I’d forgotten about him!
LikeLike
Ooh, I look away and Munster have scored their BPT!
LikeLike
Big boos going on.
LikeLike
Helluva game in Edinburgh! 26-all with 13 to go and Munster playing the bulk of that without Connor Murray (sin bin). It’s been blow for blow with neither side able to pull away.
LikeLike
Who’s Big Boo? The 23?
LikeLike
26-29 with 10 to go and Munster with a narrow lead. And from the restart Edinburgh get a penalty on the Munster 22! They go for the corner…
… and cock it up!
LikeLike
Seems to have knocked the stuffing out of Edinburgh, who are clinging on now. 3 minutes to go, Munster penalty and they’re going for the corner. Edinburgh repel the maul but Munster are relentless. They lose it and Edinburgh run from behind their tryline! It’s all a mess and Munster kick it out for a narrow win!
LikeLike
Great game, and on another day Edinburgh would’ve squeaked it. Munster grinding out the results though.
LikeLike
The mister, who was paying more attention, reckons Munster’s victory was down to the ref. But then he hates Munster; I’m sure it was richly deserved.
LikeLike
It really wasn’t richly deserved Thaum. More just about deserved after a couple of very dubious decisions which heavily influenced the game. The Snyman one was completely ridiculous.
BTW, I heard today from I can’t remember where that “Thaumaturge” means magician.
Cool
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ticht – I learned that fact from Discworld. A ‘thaum’ is a unit of magic in the series.
LikeLiked by 1 person
…. a worker of wonders and performer of miracles……………
LikeLiked by 3 people
Hasn’t helped Ulster. Ahem.
Bulls 7-0 up inside 4 minutes as Canaan Moodie flies through a gap to score. KLA almost away on the other side but there was a knock from the Bulls in the tackle
LikeLike
Benneton get a scrum penalty – one each – and they’re deep into the Bulls 22. Bulls defence is solid, but eventually pinged for being too quick off the mark. They pinch the overthrown lineout and scorch downfield. Bulls scrum on the Treviso 22. Free kick and they’re still able to take the scrum again. They hammer away but can’t get through this time.
LikeLike
Bulls take it through multiple phases and eventually Treviso run out of bodies, with David Kriel sauntering over. 14-0 after 18 minutes.
LikeLike
Arendse get his first of the afternoon and it’s 19-0 as the conversion drifts wide. So far the Italians are only getting into the Bulls half from kick offs.
Willie le Roux does some nifty footwork in midfield to open up the Benneton defence and lock Nortje is over for the BP after 25 minutes. Only question at the moment is what score the Bulls will finish with and what impact it has on points difference.
LikeLike
Benneton scored whilst I was pouring wine. 26-7 and they’ve got a penalty too. They’re starting to just get a foothold in the match.
And then an overthrown lineout, stolen by the Bulls and a lovely out the back of the hand pass by Elrich Louw sees Moodie in for his second and the Bulls 5th a couple of minutes before the break. 31-7 as another Goosen conversion drifts wide.
LikeLike
Benneton kick a penalty to the corner and drive the maul over! 31-14 as Rhyno Smith knocks over the extras from the touchline! And that’s oranges.
LikeLike
Benneton scored again! Andy Uren pissing on Pretoria’s parade! 31-21 and Benneton aren’t lying down here. Bulls need to wake up a bit!
LikeLike
Holly Davidson revving the Bulls over their offsides. But they get a penalty for obstruction, kick to the corner and the Angry Warthog – McDuhan’s better looking brother barges over! 36-21 with Goosen missing a 3rd conversion.
LikeLike
Another mistake by Benneton and Kriel pounces! Options either side, but he’s got the gas to go it alone. 43-21 after 55. Kriel must be knocking on Rassie’s door with some excellent games this season and Am still not the player he was a couple of seasons back.
LikeLike
Gee. Benneton cock up the kick off and from the scrum on the centre spot, Goosen breaks, Kriel flies through and gives it to Moodie for another. 48-21 with a fourth conversion missed, but a Moodie hattrick!
LikeLike
Benneton ring the changes and the fresh legs work with some lovely hands and phase play! 48-28 with the conversion, but more importantly, a try bonus point.
LikeLike
Bulls opt for posts from a penalty and Smith obliges. 51-28 with about six to go. Bulls have been very good on attack, but a bit sleepy on defence and Benneton get a fifth. 51-35. According to Schalk Burger, in the build up, Holly Davidson rode the tackle quite nicely. I must have missed that.
LikeLike
The Bulls come again and get their 9th try on the hooter. 56-35 as Smith misses the extras and it’s game over.
LikeLike
Lions v Glasgow up next! Much as I hope the 🦁 create an upset, I don’t think it’s happening. This Weege side is too classy. 40-year old Willem Alberts playing his last match at Ellis Park.
LikeLike
Both sides giving it plenty of air early on. Lions with a penalty, but talisman Emmanuel Tshituka is off, hopefully not for too long. Kick to the Weege 22 and over the advantage line and another penalty. Right in front. And wide! Two missed penalties already! Lions give it air, Warriors intercept and score at the other end. They’re looking at something though. Looks like foul play by the Lions replacement loosie Venter. Dumb. 0-7 as Horne slots the extras.
LikeLike
Glasgow are looking fabulous ball in hand, but Darge eventually spills it in the tackle and the Lions get out of jail. For how long though? Lions have advantage and are making ground, into the 22. Slow ball. And another penalty.
LikeLike
Opt for the scrum under the posts. Messy, reset. Penalty Lions! Van den Bergh taps and scores! But from the wrong spot. They’ll take the 3. Surely can’t miss this one! 3-7 after 26 minutes.
LikeLike
From the restart Glasgow win the scrum on the Lions 22. Through the hands and Kyle Rowe in for his 2nd! Or held up? No try! Lions lucky!
LikeLike
Glasgow go wide quickly and early again, and again Darge spills the pass on the wing. Warriors turn it over kick through and the 🦁 run from behind their tryline. Cock it up and Glasgow have the lineout deep in the Lions 22. Lions end up with a penalty from a scrum and can clear. Hendrickse has a helluva boot, getting it down to the Weege 10m line. From the lineout, the Lions go wide and Maxwane scores to take them into an unlikely lead! 8-7, could’ve been more but for wayward kicking.
Oh dear. Lions replacement loosie looks like he’s gone – head contact and he’s already had a yellow. Gonna play the second half with 14.
LikeLike
Nothing malicious and he immediately apologized and after being sent off, but decision was 100%
LikeLike
Lions with a yellow now for a deliberate knock on. They’re hanging on by the skin of their teeth, but turn Glasgow over twice to get into the break with a point lead, but only 13 players…
Lions have been willing and gone toe toe with the Weege, but I can’t see them hanging on after the break.
LikeLike
Bristol got off to a flying start, scoring in the first minute. The half ended with Bristol leading Quins 14-21.
Good start to the second half too, Thacker scoring on 43mins. 14-26
LikeLike
Glasgow finally batter their way over and lead 14-8. The Lions almost retake the lead with a neat dab through, but seconds later Glasgow are hauled down metres short. The Lions go end to end and score under the posts!15-14 Lions! And from the restart, the Lions snaffle it and score again! Ref checking something. Try! 22-14!
LikeLike
And another! Just fantastic counter attacking and handling! 29-14 with 20 to go! They’ve got the bonus point and at this stage the Weege have nothing!
LikeLike
Debbie, it’s not the wine, this is actually happening.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sorry, that was an autocorrect Deebee
LikeLiked by 1 person
Which team has 14 again?
LikeLike
Weege go wide from the scrum – they have to now – and Nohamba intercepts and scores next to the posts! 36-14 with 16 to go! Weege come again and the Lions win the penalty on the ground! Nothing going Glasgow’s way in the second half!
LikeLike
Penalty Glasgow in the Lions 22. They surely have to make this count. 12 to go as they set the lineout. And finally they get the try! Josh McKay from close range. 36-21 with 11 to go. Can the Lions hold on? Will the Weege pull a rabbit out a hat?
LikeLike
Glasgow are are getting everything they deserve out of this match
LikeLike
Glasgow run the kick off from deep in their 22 but knock it on! Scrum Lions, who understandably are not in a hurry to get restarted. The Lions pick and go, pick and go and eventually Weege discipline crumbles. Penalty! 39-21 with six minutes left!
LikeLike
Glasgow seemed to over complicate their attacks too often. Too much passing behind the advantage line trying to bring runners on the angle. Worked early on, but the Lions seemed to figure it out and their attack in the second half has been sublime. If Sanele Nohamba doesn’t get a Bok cap this year I don’t know.
LikeLike
Some wild results in England resulting in the top 4 places being Northampton, Bath, Sale, Saracens.
I don’t think anyone predicted that!
LikeLike
The Lions will scarcely have played a poorer side than they have in this half.
LikeLike