Last night I was ‘forced’ (Mothership usage of term, meaning doing it quite voluntarily) to watch a Peter Green tribute show led by Mick Fleetwood.
There is a star-studded cast of musicians, mostly playing very well, but they insist on playing twelve-bar blues, which must be the most rigid and repetitive form of music in existence, except for the even more terrible ones.
It’s like watching endless pick-and-goes, only there might be a chance of something exciting and different happening as a result of those pick-and-goes. A try might be created, or a horrible mistake might occur that leads to an end-to-end score by the opposition.
No chance of anything like that with twelve-bar blues, even as played by expert musicians. It is going to have exactly the same key and rhythm, the same clichéd lyrical and musical tropes, everything completely predictable and boring. The musical ball gets recycled, stuffed up the jumper, and goes again. And again. And again.
It’s also like watching scrums being reset for what feels like hours, but is probably only about three or four minutes. And the same thing happens in every scrum, but the referee just calls for a reset again. And again. And again. A dystopian nightmare.
But rejoice! There is some rugby available to watch in the near future, and hopefully it will be much more exciting than that.
Onna telly in the next week or so
Showing matches that are televised in the UK and Ireland or on popular subscription services. Bold indicates that it’s on a free to view channel. Times are in the UK zone, so adjust as necessary.
Friday 6th September
| Tonga v Fiji | 04:00 | TNT Sports 1 |
| Japan v USA | 11:05 | TNT Sports 1 |
| Scotland v Wales (women) | 19:35 | iPlayer |
Saturday 7th September
| Bayonne v Perpignan | 13:30 | Premier Sports 1 |
| England v France (women) | 15:30 | BBC1 |
| South Africa v New Zealand | 16:00 | Sky Sports Mix |
| Argentina v Australia | 20:00 | Sky Sports + |
| Bordeaux v Stade Français | 20:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
Sunday 8th September
| La Rochelle v Toulon | 16:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
| Vannes v Toulouse | 20:00 | Premier Sports 1 |
Ovally Balls 
Lions really need a new home.
Sounds like it! Ellis Park is far too big apart from anything else.
Let’s hope Ulster start the second half as they finished the first.
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Let’s hope not.
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And they have! TRY Morgan!
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15-10 and Ulster have really upped their intensity either side of oranges.
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Have the Lions struck straight back? Held up the call. But penalty for offside. Lineout, maul, try!!! Conversion from the touchline is wide of the right upright. 20-10.
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Lions! From the restart they kick downfield, Ulster reply and Cuan Horn beats some very ordinary tackling to set up Henco van Wyk for a jog in under the posts. Checking for blocking. No obstruction! Try stands! 27-10! 🦁
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very ordinary tackling
I think you mean desperately poor defence.
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Ulster bringing on the cavalry. Still nearly 30 to go, so no way they’re out of it. Handling letting them down and the Lions have a penalty they can put into the corner. Offside and another penalty. It’s right in front, so they’ll take the 3.
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The fact that Morgan is being replaced by Doak in the 56th minute tells you a lot about how good Morgan has been, try notwithstanding.
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The graphic lied. Doak is replacing Cooney.
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TRY Kok!
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WTF? Doak has also missed the conversion.
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Lions deep on attack again, but Ulster turn it over, boot it downfield and Werner Kok beats everyone to the ball to score! 30-15 with the conversion off the post.
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Both sides running everything and it’s anybody’s game with 16 still to go. Ulster getting some rhythm into their game and winning the 50-50s, almost scoring out wide, but Lions 🦁 win the penalty!
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Lions cheated there, Deebee! Hands on the floor.
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Apparently Ntlabakanye, the 150+kg prop was at the same school as me! Free lunches may well be in the school DNA.
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Paws, Thauma, 🐾
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BP TRY!
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Ulster score their fourth! Right in front so surely can’t miss this conversion? Got it! 30-22 with a couple to go.
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Lions score again. Bye-bye, all hope of LBP as well.
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Kade Wolhuter, the Lions 10 evades a few tired tackles to score at the death. Final score 35-22 as the kick drifts wide.
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Next up the Bulls and Edinburgh! Should be a good one!
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35-22 at FT, and well deserved.
Werner Kok must be our best forrin signing since Pienaar; he’s fab.
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Kok will always give 100% on attack and defence. Was World 7z POTY a while back and is unlucky that we’ve got a bunch of good wings in the Bok set up, or he’d definitely have been capped.
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I was thinking Why the fuck have we bought a winger, of all things?, but he really is superb and plays about ten positions.
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*Ten positions in the same match, I mean!
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No score at Loftus after 10 minutes either, but both sides prepared to give it air. Bulls penalised for a second early shove, although I’m not sure Edinburgh took the hit on that one. Well milked! Bulls conceding a couple of early penalties, which Jake White will drone on about. Cameron Hanekom, being talked about as Pierre Spies Mk2, wins a turnover penalty.
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Bulls lineout is a mess so far, and getting pinged in the scrums. Putting them on the back foot and Edinburgh taking good advantage. 0-3 as Edinburgh knock over the penalty.
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Edinburgh loosies bossing the breakdown. Bulls win it back and flood down the blindside. Shoulda kept it in hand instead of the cute dink through that allowed Edinburgh to clear. 20 gone and a water break. Probably 32 or 33 degrees in Pretoria.
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Edinburgh lineout going runny now and allowing the Bulls some territory. Scrum is a mess. Bulls TH is about a head taller than his hooker and LH, I wonder if that’s causing instability?
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Looks like Duhan took a wrong turn in Pretoria and got a haircut at Defence HQ!
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Bulls scored a try whilst I was fetching a beer and Thauma favourite Marcel Coetzee is on the pitch. Bulls flooding forward and score again! All of a sudden they’ve just clicked. 12-3 after hooking the conversion.
Canaan Moodie looking really good ball in hand. Massive storm building here in Jozi, hope it doesn’t get to Loftus before the game is done.
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Bulls loose head getting stuffed. Looks like he’s taking the bind too far back and thus unstable on the bind, says the nine who couldn’t give a shit about the adventures of the Lardy Boys.
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Bulls carded for infringements in the red zone. Edinburgh batter away through the phases and just when big Duhan vd Merwe looks like he’ll barge through, his brother Akker strips the ball and the Bulls clear! Not very far and from the lineout, Ashman goes over from the maul!
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Thompson adds the extras from out wide and it’s 12-10 to the Bulls at HT.
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Bulls scrum still a complete mess, although the ref seems to be a bit confused about it too. Seems to me Edinburgh just aren’t taking the hit, so the Bulls are overextending.
Game is opening up now, but both sides just not finical enough. Last 20 should be pretty tight. Edinburgh’s loosies have been superb, really disrupting the Bulls ball, but when the Bulls get it wide they look very dangerous.
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Bulls scrum in disarray. Matanzima, the replacement loosehead sent on to stabilise the scrum, is binned for repeated drops on that side of the scrum. Water break and it’s 12-13, Edinburgh ahead and good for the lead. They’ve got a penalty and kick it to 10m from the Bulls line. 15 phases and the Bulls turn it over on their line! Spread it wide, hoof it downfield, win the 50-22, take it quickly and Moodie is under the sticks! 19-13 with 15 to go!
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Hanekom breaks blind, bulldozes over a few and the Bulls look like they’re in for all money, but Duhan intercepts! Then penalised at the breakdown and handbags ensue! Bulls knock the penalty over and it’s 22-13 approaching the final 10 minutes.
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Ashman binned for a late tackle I think, and Edinburgh will finish with 14. Bulls kick to the corner. End tocend stuff! Edinburgh prop kicks from behind his line, Moodie gathers but caught short, go wide, intercept and you’d put your house on Duhan scoring at the other end, but bundled into touch! Penalty Edinburgh and it’s 22-16 with five to go!
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Just seen the Zebre score! They beat Munster 42-33! Did not see that coming!
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BOKKE! Great result and some sublime play. Manie Libbok is simply something else ball in hand (yes I know, after his missed kick last week I wanted him hung, drawn and quartered) but on the front foot he’s quite beautiful to watch.
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Fucking hell, Boks weren’t messing around.
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How’s the recovery going, Refit?
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Passed all my tests, just waiting for surgery now – which will be Tues.
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Oh, that’ll be fun! How do you manage to type with two broken shoulders?
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I still have one working hand hahaha
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CFT sounds so incredibly bitter, in this bit from his autobiography, it almost reads like parody
Sexton reveals details of Ioane row in final game – https://www.bbc.com/sport/rugby-union/articles/ckg9jxxljgzo
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Neither player comes across as a jolly, likeable fella.
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Bastards killed the blog for starters.
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Well, I for one am still trying to avoid commenting on the significance of Refit telling us that he has one working hand.
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